17
Sep
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I think the gay people at this time are very popular to see in all the Word. Buy, most of these gays face racism because the people think that they are different or they are sinking. In the class Sam tell us what happen if we parents are gay? All the class gets surprised because we never heard something like Sam say. I never think how the parents wait to the less time to tell the family that they are gay. My parents never are one of these people because they are very strict and they never accept one of his sons is gays. My parents do not look these persons that discriminated the gay but they tell me that this people are perverted because they what to adopt kid. I have many friends that are gays. They are a good person and they are very different that other people I do not talk about how they look, they are more generous and patient people. I respect this people but I think if one member of my family is gays I get really sad and disappointed because they have to change all his life. But, today it is not a big deal because a lot of gay come out of the closers. The gay that do not come out of the closers is because they do not want to make a problem in his families. The gays should want to have the same right that all the people have but that’s impossible because most of the people make protest to take out all the gays. Even though they have a different sexual preference they are human beings and they deserve to have a normal life. We all dream of having a happy and united family. I believe that all kids should have a maternal and paternal image and if not they can have a psychological effect, which is one of the most important reasons why lesbians and gays decide to come out of the closet in their late adult life. Being lesbian or gay in today’s society is not such a big deal anymore but just thinking about having a parent that made you most likely to satisfy society not their own wishes or wants is hard to digest. I come from a very conservative family in which other sexual preferences are not seen as the right thing to be. I think the lesbian and gay is this people that have a terrible past and that why they change his sex. My opinion is the gay can have the same right that everybody has and they can have anything that they want. Gays and lesbians do not have to face any problems for his preferences.
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How about if one of my parents were gay what would I do? I myself have many gay and lesbian friends which I am cool with there actually very cool people. I think parents later after having created a family to tell that their gay is very weird, crazy difficult for them to come and just say there gay, but at the same time they gain courage and they grow up and learn to be who they are in there long way. Even if it take a whole 20 years. It something you never would have thought of life. Throughout my years of school I saw many of my friends come out of the close around there high school years for some reason they thought it was the right time to tell their parents about their situation and how they felt about it . I guest by then everyone around were able to understand them we were considered almost adults so everyone knew how to take the situation. But to find out that your parents are gay is something crazy out of the ordinary. It not why your parents it that why did they have children before deciding there sex or why wait so long in order to talk about their sex for me I would probably be upset but I think I would learn how to understand my parents. I would learn how to understand them for the reason that they are my parent and I can’t change anything about it and I would want to change anything because there great parent like I said before I probably be upset for a little for them not have told early but that would be it. Say for example that one of my parent was gay and had a same sex partner while being with my other parent at the same time then I wouldn’t want to like to talk to them, because I believe that they should be able to speak to the person they promise to spend their life with. I believe that they should have gain trust with that person and hopeful the partner knows how to understand them. But otherwise I think it wouldn’t really matter to me their my parents and I can’t change that at all plus if I stop talking to them doesn’t resolve the problem it just makes it bigger then what already is. I think my reaction might be of what are you talking about are you joking? I would probably tell my parents that it not April fools day so start talking seriously. What wrong with you or like did you forget to drink your medication or did you take too many? After all everyone in today’s world have learned to understand and accept the whole concept of gay and lesbian people. There normally people, but different preference which makes everyone a unique person.
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Isn’t it funny how people think we have progressed so much? I think so because for the most part we are still the same as we were 20 some odd years ago and even centuries before that. We just go through cycles of acceptability. Derogatory terms still exist just the words have changed. We have never learned from history. We just come up with ways so that it doesn’t look like what we did in the past. We just disguise what we did with some sort of excuse even though we have committed something along the lines of the concept before. This applies to feelings towards gays and lesbians. More people are coming out about it, but there is still some sort disdain amongst a portion of the general public about. liberals and activists see it as a good thing that people are coming out and embracing it, but does that really mean we have progressed?
I don’t see it as much of a progression. I think it is a step towards progression of acceptance of people no matter their beliefs, but there are still people out there who are too scared to come out because they know people will think differently about them to some extent. They are scared because a good portion of the population is against the idea of men attracted to men or women attracted to women. Bush even put a law into effect that denied gay and lesbian couples to get married. That deters people from coming out and embracing who we are so that is not progression. It is digression if anything. I would like to see basic rights given to people no matter sexuality, gender, race, or any other sort of prejudice you can think of. Once we can break down these walls of prejudice, we can make a real step towards progression.
I do think more people embracing their sexuality and pushing for same rights as other people is starting to break down feelings of prejudice, but like Sam said in class many of us have friends and family that is too scared to come out so we will never know. Once more people start coming out to their friends and family, then we can really progress as a people and move past prejudices.
Personally, I have friends who have told me that they are gay/lesbian, but I know that they still can’t tell their best friends or parents. The people they truly love will never get to know them, and I think that is a shame and can hinder the relationship they have. I support my gay and lesbian friends because I know it can be hard especially if the people around them are not as understanding. I have seen the benefits and consequences of coming out with people in my family. Many of my cousins are gay and have gotten past the first hurdle and became very happy with who they are. One of which is now married and adopted a son with her life partner. They are very happy together and their son is growing up like any other kid would maybe even better because he has two loving parents where as some children only have one parent. I think when people see that if two love each other and happy and comfortable in their own skin it won’t matter that they are of the same gender. I make sure my friends see that there are benefits to being themselves and that they will always have some support for when things do get hard.
People still are scared to be open about being gay and for good reason. They have not been supported by the majority of the country and are treated poorly as a result of who they are attracted to. It upsets me that they receive this treatment when it is just as silly as judging people on race, religion, etc. It shows how far we haven’t gotten in so many years. There was once a time when Greeks practiced homosexuality and it was acceptable. It was in fashion, but faded somewhere along the line. It is just a cycle that shows how much we don’t really change or progress as a society. We repeat practices done throughout history not really going anywhere. Progression may happen once prejudices break, and that can be through the acceptance and embracing of sexuality, but it has yet to happen. It is then likely we will just find something that is deemed unacceptable, accept it, and then move onto something else. It may be a less the optimistic view, but it is true of reality.
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My initial reaction to the “Not My Parents” video clip was disbelief; but after he justified his claim with statistics and intellect, it really started to make sense. Of course, the student body didn’t seem to think so since they hold their parents to such high expectations. Just like the rest of the class, I began to question the possibility of my parents being gay. I don’t know, they’ve been married for twenty-four years now with four children I don’t really see any signs or temptations for either for them to convert sexuality. Then I also began to wonder how different my life would have been if I was raised by two parents of the same sex. The controversial gossip through both elementary and middle school would probably make an impact on the way I view my parents and how others view me. After listening to the statistics, fourteen hundred biological parents, you would think the possibility of finding at least one gay parent would be significantly high. However, whether it be denial or cluelessness that’s preventing us from realizing the facts, the chances of finding at least one homosexual is definitely present. I would expect the number of students with gay parents will significantly increase within the next few years as a response to the massive coming out party of the nineties and 2000’s. Everyday, our population is getting larger and larger resulting in a larger gay population. As our society becomes more and more submerged in change, the population demographic will change. The interesting thing about that is predicting how the existing population and society will react to this change. I am willing to admit that I am scared in seeing how the youth population reacts to these upcoming changes. If a student were to have homosexual parents, they would be an easy target for mockery and humiliation throughout their schooling. Sure they may not think themselves as verbal bait, but others who have not accepted the change will respond with hostility. Within the next few years, as the gay population increases, it will be interesting to see how the entire society responds to this change whether it be with acceptance or denial. If I were to find out tomorrow that either my father or mother was gay, I would be baffled. After living entire lives of heterosexuality, I still don’t think I would change my point of view on them at all. It wouldn’t have made a difference in how they raised me. Whether they were to be gay or straight, in the end they would still be my parents and still be by my side no matter what were to happen to me. Thank you mom and dad.
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When the class reacted by gasping and laughing to Sam’s suggestion that some of us sitting in the classroom have gay parents that have just not come out yet, I wasn’t surprised. I too chuckled and quickly tried to imagine what that would be like before completely erasing that thought from all possibilities and my mind. The fact is, a lot of people, even people my age who have grown up in a more accepting world, say that they feel comfortable with people being gay but at the same time don’t want any part of it in their own lives. I guess I would say this is true for me, not because I’m homophobic or a mean person, I just can’t imagine how different it would make my life so I can’t honestly say that I would be totally fine with it. I think it’s different too if growing up with a gay parent was all one knew, but to face it later on in life would be too much of a shock and probably be really hard to deal with because it brings up the issues of honesty and trust. If my mom or dad lied to our family for most of his or her life, I couldn’t help but be furious. Often times my immediate reaction to someone lying or upsetting me is to completely shut them out. So if one day my parents broke the news to my brother and I that they were separating after twenty-six years of marriage and the reason was because one of them was gay, that would be pretty hard to swallow. However, it would be equally as difficult to accept the fact that one of them was cheating. So what’s the difference? On the other hand, parents are there to love, support, and provide for their children. It doesn’t matter their sexual orientation as long as they make choices in the best interest of their kids. I don’t think the class’ reaction was any different than the reaction of the majority of our population. It just proved the point that we have a long way to go before every one is actually accepted equally in our society, which is pretty sad. I hate that my reaction to this suggestion made me wince because I fully support gay rights. So does that make me a hypocrite? I honestly don’t think it does. It’s just an idea that I had never considered in my entire life. The unfamiliar makes people feel uncomfortable. A big part of what upsets people also is what the perception of them will be to other people in their lives. What will they think? Becomes a major question. How can I explain this to everyone else? We care so much about what others think of us that it often interferes with our own happiness and self-worth.
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That part of Sam’s lecture was very eye opening. It was amazing to see almost the whole class raise their hand when he asked who had at least one gay friend. I myself do not have a close gay friend, but are acquainted with many and have a few friends whom I suspect will come out later in life. It’s interesting how the class had no problem admitting they had gay friends, but when asked if we had gay parents, their was almost a weird shift in the room and no one raised their hands. Surely someone in that room has a gay parent, but society has taught them this isn’t very acceptable, so they kept their hand down. I find this very sad. Just like being proud of your race, people should be proud of their sexual orientation, or that of their parents and should be proud to raise their hand. I wonder how that person in class, who had a gay parent, felt when no one raised their hand and snickered at the idea of someone actually having gay parents. I’m sure it’s the same feeling a particular race feels when they are called out in class.
While it is easy for me to say I think people should be proud of their gay parents, I cant imagine one of my parents calling me today and admitting they were gay. I would be devastated. Not because they were gay, but because my parents have been in a loving relationship for over 25 years. It would be heartbreaking to see them separate. Divorce must be extra hard for children with gay parents. Not only do they have to deal with the separation, they have to accept the fact that one of their parents is gay. Which for many kids in my generation might be hard to accept. I know eventually I would accept that fact and learn to be happy for my mom/dad because in the end, all that matters is their happiness. And I would hope that I would be that student who wasn’t ashamed to raise my hand in front of 725 others and proclaim I had a gay parent and was proud of it.
Hopefully it will be my children’s generation that will experience a world with no prejudice and will be accepting of all colors and sexual orientations. I think it is my generation that has to make this change so that our kids can enjoy a world without hate. I hope that my child won’t even notice all the different colors of skin at her school’s playground. I hope that she will learn to play with all “types” of children and not even think twice that they may not be just like her.
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I think Sam makes a very valid point with this video. Considering it is just now becoming “socially acceptable” to be gay, and it still is not in some cultures, people in our parent’s generation may not have been able to accept themselves and come out when they were younger. They were probably forced by social norms to conform and get married, to a person of the opposite sex. Now, however, as the world becomes more accepting of different people many of those same people feel more comfortable coming out and finally showing their friends and family the person they truly are.
While I am fairly, if not completely, certain that neither of my mom or dad is gay, I do in fact have family friends who have recently split up because the male in the relationship finally accept himself as being gay. The couple recently adopted a son, and while he does not understand why his parents have split up now, I am sure that in the future he will, and I am also sure he will be faced with questions and cruelty from his peers. Even though it is becoming more widely accepted to be gay in our society, I think that we still have a long way to go, and people from previous generations who were too afraid or unsure about coming out in the past still need to feel like they have a safe environment to step in to now. On the same note, I think “the sooner the better” in most situations because waiting will only create more unrest within their family.
On a completely different level, I also have family friends who are an openly gay, committed couple who adopted a son four years ago and are now in the process of adopting another child. Their son clearly understands that his parents are different then most of his friends’ parents, but he has already learned to deal with it, and will therefore be more well equipped to deal with criticism in the future. In some regards I think this situation is “more ideal,” even though some people are still not open to families that are different from their own. While I definitely do not mean to say that adults who are just becoming comfortable enough to come out now should not, if they have kids, because it will be hard on them, I do think that such situations need to be handled with extreme care. For instance, if I were to be told one day that everything I thought I knew about my family was about to completely change, I would be terrified and extremely confused. Now, personally, that is not to say I would not be accepting of the situation in the long run, but some people definitely do not feel that way…so homosexual people out there who are currently involved in a heterosexual relationship, remember that in many circumstances, the long you wait, the harder it will be to finally let the world know who you are!
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Before I start this entry, I want to say that I am 97% positive neither of my parents are gay but I am going to say some things that would make one think the contrary. It is just that I have a very feminine dad and could come to grips with it if one day he were to come out of the closet. However homophobic I may or may not be has nothing to do with it. My dad just might be gay. Growing up my dad was always the most caring person in the entire world. He is the first person to go for the mouth kiss with his brothers and his dad, and in the first years of my life me. I remember the first time I said, “No dad men don’t kiss eachother on the lips,” and the most disappointed look on his face. I don’t mean to say that he has any sexual feelings towards me or any other members of his family, in fact I almost just threw up from thinking about it, I’m just saying he’s a little too comfortable with the male on male kissing. Not just that, he is very feminine. He is very clean and always files his nails, brushes his hair, and takes overrall great care of himself. My mom and I like to make fun of him for the way he talks to people on the phone. When he talks to business partners he is down to business manly man, but if he talks to anyone in his family, it is like he is talking to a baby. His voice gets all high and he says stuff like ‘heeyyyyyy honey, I miss you sooo much how are things.’ He is an incredible man and no matter what I would love him to death, and he is most likely not gay considering he is about to be 60 years old and in his second marriage. When he first got divorced from my mom, some of my asshole friends said things like “dude, your dad is totally gonna hook up with a guy,” but after a few punches to the arms, and a few hetero dates for my dad, the comments stopped. I may be a little homophobic, considering I have no gay friends, and have never really come into contact with a full-blown gay person, so I don’t really know how I would act if one of my best friends let alone my dad were to tell me that they were officially interested in dudes. I do know however, that I was one of the people in class who said “oooooohhh” after Professor Richards (Sam?) told the class that one of our parents might be gay. Its just one of those taboo topics that no matter how much people say they are completely unhomophobic, people don’t want to think about. I on the other hand, have though about it and would like to think that I wouldn’t care too much if it turned out to be true.
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I have honestly never thought of the possibility or occurrence of having gay parents. I know it is a huge debate, especially today with the whole debacle of gay marriage, whether or not a gay couple can adopt or have children of their own. Some people say that the kids will grow up in an atmosphere that could be detrimental to the child’s growth and cause sociological and psychological problems later in life, while others hold that it is perfectly normal and the child would grow up just as any child with heterosexual parents. I really do not have an opinion on the topic myself, but I would not personally want to be raised by gay parents. Even the thought of finding out that my parents were gay, especially at an older age, I would be shocked. I do not think I would be able to wrap my mind around the concept that my whole life one, or both, of my parents were gay, especially after thirty years of marriage and four children. I don’t feel that I would think my whole life I was being lied to because I grew up in a great house with parents who loved me and raised me right. I could not imagine, myself, growing up in a hose with two gay parents. I can only imagine growing up in that atmosphere and the ridicule one would get from the outside world. Not just getting picked on at school by other kids, but there are many older people that believe gays to be unequal. But it is interesting to think that 4% of the population is gay and the probability of having gay parents. If you do the math, that means a little more than 20 students in our class have a gay parent or gay parents; I find that quite intriguing. I do like what Bill Maher said on his show awhile back that stuck in my head. He said, “Homosexuals are not the ones destroying the sanctity of marriage, it’s the heterosexuals that are.” The divorce rate is at around fifty percent for heterosexual marriage, and I am not sure what it is for homosexuals but it is extremely low. I thought it was a good point especially for this topic. What do you think is worse: growing up in a household with gay parents or a household with parents getting a divorce? I do not know anyone with gay parents; I was actually one of the people that does not have gay friends. So I am somewhat ignorant to this topic because I do not know much about it. On the other hand, I have seen what divorces can do to a lot of my friends, and it doesn’t seem like something I would want to go through.
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First off, I would just like to say how Sam left the end of this blog. He made it so that I would think about and process what he just said. By doing the math, yes, it is probable that a small number of our parents are gay and we don’t even know it (since they come out later in life.) They may just be waiting for the last child to leave home so that they can come out, OR not come out at all. Of course, everyone believes that it is not their own parents. When my best friend in middle school told me that she had two moms, I was a bit shocked. I hadn’t learned whether or not being a lesbian was accepted in society. I also had never even thought about what my reaction would be like if someone told me that. However, I got to know her two moms very well and they were normal people just like you and me. I didn’t have any problem with being seen with a friend who had two moms (even though a lot of people in middle school did make fun of her.) I always stood by her side. None of my close friends have ever come out of the closet, although I do believe that one or two may tell me at our high school reunion. Even though I thought that they may not be straight, I still hung out with them and didn’t look at them in a different way. If a close friend were to ever tell me I would just be like ‘hey, that’s great! I’m happy for you. You gotta do what you gotta do’ type of thing.
However, I feel like I would have such a different reaction if my parents were to divorce because one of them was gay/lesbian. I would obviously be supportive (I mean, you really can’t help who you fall in love with regardless of gender preference.) I definitely would not be happy at first. Ever since I was little, I would imagine what my family would be like in the future. I do believe in divorce, but if you have a happy family, then it shouldn’t be necessary. I would feel extremely bad for the one of my parents that was straight and was never told the truth by the other. I have gotten so used to doing things as a family with my family that if one were to move out, it would be a total change. I guess I can’t be selfish in a situation like that though. I would be supportive and would have to get used to the idea in time. I love both of my parents so what ever they choose to do, I will love them no matter what. We never really think that it could happen to us, but it does happen to many people.
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I am from a little suburban neighborhood in York, PA. White picket fence, tons of flowers and well-kept lawns, we have the country clubs, the award-winning school districts – you name it. There really is nothing out of the ordinary, nothing… different. Describing my town as “sheltered” might be an understatement. I have no friends with gay parents (of my knowledge) and I haven’t even heard of a family I know going through this situation. Unless it was in a movie or television show, I haven’t been exposed to this issue at all.
I am friends with a few gay people at school, I do not discriminate… I feel like whomever you fall in love with/who you’re attracted to is YOUR rightful choice. You have to follow your heart, doesn’t matter if it’s typical or widely accepted. Though, I still would be shocked and upset if it was one of my parents.
My true reaction to the idea that my parents could be gay was/is: “Hah, not my parents.” Just like everyone else in that room. The end of Sam’s blog was really thought provoking though, because honestly – it is statistically probable that some of us in Sociology 119 have gay parents (given the fact that many gay/lesbian/transgender people come out later in life). But still, there’s no way either of my parents are gay. My dad’s Mr. Football Coach/Army guy and my mom is a happy/home-making woman. But who knows I guess?
If one of them would come out to me, I am not completely sure of what my reaction would be. I would be supportive, of course… I love them with all of my heart. I would be upset mostly about the divorce, the change in my life, the change in my family dynamic… and probably the fact that I’ve been lied to my entire life. (I’d also be upset for parent who had no idea of the other parent’s sexual orientation).
I came home for the weekend, and I showed my mother this “Not my Parents” video, and she just laughed.. just like all of the kids in the class. The reaction to this video is quite priceless – because not many people would ever EXPECT this whole issue to happen to our families. The laughter shows that even entertaining the idea is somewhat funny and/or so hilariously ridiculous to most people. We need to face it that this IS statistically probable and open our minds to the ideas. How can this happen because when half of us think about it- (I read many of the post responses)– we’d be upset, shocked or whatever. I might sound like a hypocrite right now, because I’ve said that I’d be shocked and upset too – but I feel like I’d eventually get over it. Life comes at you fast.. and it’s too short to be upset about someone else’s true feelings, especially if you love them and they gave you your life.
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I did not have the same reaction that the rest of the class had to your statement about us possibly having gay parents. Personally, I am acquainted with two people whom both “came out of the closet” after having been married and having children. One was a close childhood friend of my mother whose wedding she attended and whose children bat mitzvahs I attended. It was a shock to us that she had left her rich handsome husband for a woman but, it has been many years and I believe her family has adjusted however, will never be the same.
I believe that since the cultural change that has occurred over the years that more people are coming out and expressing their sexuality prior to marriage and having children. Before the much more known acceptance of homosexuality, people were afraid to come out thus denying their sexuality and marrying people whom which they loved but were not sexually attracted to. These people “stuck in the closet” were afraid to “come out” because of what their friends and family would think. Often being gay becomes a religious conflict. I was watching an episode of the Tyra Show the other day about an exorcism to remove the homosexual demons that were in this gay boys body. It was shocking. These beliefs are old school and are slowly becoming less visible.
In today’s society being a part of the homosexual community is much more accepted. Not by all cultures of course, and there are definitely still people who will either deny their true feelings for life or will decide to come out at a later time in life possibly after marriage. It seems to me as though our society is moving at an extremely fast pace in the fight against this type of discrimination. It seems as though our society is more excepting of homosexuals than people of color. Looking from the outside at society as a whole it just seems as though gay pride is everywhere. Those accepting of gays love them.
I believe the saying goes “every girl needs a gay best friend”. I have never heard that line about a man or women of color or of a different culture. Society has embraced the gay community. The media loves Perez Hilton and what a character he brings to his gossip seeking fans. Another example, and possibly everyone’s favorite lesbian, Ellen DeGeneres, the daytime talk show host whose show brings in millions of viewers everyday. Shows such as, The L Word, Nip/Tuck, Desperate Housewives and Grays Anatomy are all the biggest hit shows on prime time television and all contain aspects of the growing acceptance of the gay community. The growing list of homosexuality in today’s society is never ending. And there will be a day when kids are born to gay parents instead of having parents who become gay.
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I know many gay and lesbian people. I have friends that are gay and I am completely fine with it. I also have an uncle who is gay and he adds so much humor to my life. I love having a gay uncle. He makes family holidays very fun. He did my makeup for my proms and gives me advice on clothing. My uncle also does drag. He is a professional drag queen and he makes a lot of money doing so. My family loves him as he is and we don’t treat him differently just because he’s gay. I also have two friends who came out of the closet this year. My female friend actually has a girlfriend and that’s great because she is happy. My male friend also has a boyfriend and he isn’t too happy. He doesn’t believe his parents will accept the fact that he’s gay so he hasn’t told them yet. He has asked my uncle to be his mentor on the issue. This is good because now he has someone to talk to that understands his daily struggle. He tells his parents that he has a girlfriend and they believe him. Everyone knows he is gay except his parents. I feel like this type of behavior leads to suicide. When someone is so afraid to tell their parents because they are scared of their reaction the results could be very harmful. If his parents don’t accept him being gay he will go through a very hard and low time. I don’t think he is stable enough to go through this. He was adopted and I feel like because he thinks he owes his parents something, but you are what you are. He is gay and his parents can’t change that, but they can still choose to love him.
When I was in high school, I had a friend whose mother was a lesbian. My friend was a male and he was older than me. By the time I got to know him he was fine with his mother being a lesbian. I didn’t hear too many people making fun of him because his mother was a lesbian with a girlfriend. At the time I couldn’t understand how someone could be a lesbian and have a child. His mother was the first person I had ever heard that did that. When Sam bought up the question in class I immediately thought of my friend. I thought about how old he was when his mother told him. I thought about his reaction. I wonder how I would feel if my mother told me she was a lesbian. I guess to me it wouldn’t matter because she is my mother and I love her regardless.
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I was exposed to gay couples at a young age. My grandparents have many friends who are gay. Most of which are very close to our family. When I was younger, I was confused as to why these grown men and women were so affectionate with each other. My parents explained it to me by saying that they were best friends who really loved each other. It made sense, I guess. Most people say they want to marry their best friend. I mean that many heterosexual people want to be in a relationship with someone they can tell everything to and count on…just like a best friend.
As I grew older, and learned what it meant to be gay, I realized what my parents meant by our family friends being “best friends.” I guess since none of my relatives or immediate family members seemed to be offended or weirded out, or even acted as our friends’ relationships were out of the norm, I never saw a problem with it. When I got to high school, I met a whole new plethora of people. One of my closets friends was Nick. I always had my suspicions about his sexuality, but it didn’t hinder our friendship. Slowly but surely, Nick finally opened up to me and confirmed everything I suspected. This confirmation didn’t make me like him any less and I didn’t treat him any differently.
To this day, Nick and I are still best friends, and I love him dearly. He is one of the funniest, sincerest, and most caring people I know. If anything, I admire the courage he had to come out and not be afraid or ashamed of the person he is, especially knowing how hard it is to let everyone know you’re “different.”
The second time my parents married, they were wed by a lesbian pastor (her and her partner also close friends with my grandparents). This would have freaked out most people. Not us.
I have trouble understanding why people get so up in arms over this (sexuality). I know very religious people believe that homosexuality is a sin. Fine. Still, is it so hard in this day and age to accept someone different than you? If you were friends with someone for years, and they finally came out to you, would you just stop being friends with them?
It really bothers me when people say being gay is gross or disgusting. You may not be comfortable with it, but that doesn’t mean you should label it gross. Maybe you’re uncomfortable with PDA (public displays of affection), for example. I am too, gay or straight.
I know I’m not gay, and I’m pretty positive my parents aren’t either. Even if I were, they’d still love their daughter no matter what. It doesn’t change who I am as a person, my lifestyle would just be different than what they would have wanted. The same goes for them. If either of my parents were gay, I would love them just the same. It may not be ideal, or would take some getting used to, but they wouldn’t love me less or treat me differently, so why should I do that to them?
All in all, you can’t change who a person is. You have to accept them for who they are. If you can’t, then just turn the other cheek, but don’t go out of your way to make them feel uncomfortable, out of place (more so than they already do), or even ashamed. I’m honored to have the friends and family I have, gay, straight, or in-between, and I wouldn’t do anything to change that. Just remember, no one hates on you for being straight.
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“Beat those “Twisted Women”
Once again we experience another classic example of people using religion (an inherently peaceful thing) as an excuse to be an ass hole. Why do people abuse religion like this? Probably the demographic of humans that piss me off the most are religious zealots. I do not understand why one would want to obstruct something as precious as religion so they could have an excuse to beat women. I am almost positive that every religion follows the Golden Rule, which states, “Do unto others as you would do unto yourself.” I know this philosophy exists in Islam because Muhammad stated in his farewell sermon, “Hurt no one so that no one may hurt you.” I’m sure this cleric would absolutely love it if someone beat him incessantly just like he does to women. How could one preach the Golden Rule, then proceed to condone the beating of women? All I have to say is that Karma’s going to be a bitch for this sadistic cleric.
I can’t help but compare this situation with the prostitution crisis occurring in Thailand. After reading about Thailand in “Disposable People” I learned that Thais justify sex slavery with Buddhism. Apparently Buddhism (another religion which is inherently peaceful) gives them the power to inflict the utmost degradation upon the women of their country. How do people take something so ethical, in order to act unethically? This will forever flabbergast me.
If women are degraded in a country, there is no way a country will ever ethically sustain itself (this idea applies not only to the countries I just spoke of, but also to developed countries such as the United States). I say this, because one of the most sustainable places on earth is an anomaly amidst developing nations. This anomaly is Kerala, India. National Geographic calls Kerala, “…the Mount Everest of social development…” Why is Kerala so developed amongst its surrounding underdeveloped counter parts? Because in Kerala women are given and treated with the most utmost respect. “A heritage of female-headed households means women have always been equal participants here. Unlike almost everywhere else in Asia, women outnumber men in Kerala, suggesting that there has been no selective abortion or female infanticide” (National Geographic). This is incredible, and according to me, speaks volumes. Kerala is a thriving state in India, and surely a diamond in the rough. Kerala should serve as an example for not only Egypt and Thailand (where women are especially disrespected), but should serve as an example for the supposed “developed” countries as well. This seems so simple to me. Treat women with respect and you will thrive. It seems so easy, so why don’t we do it?
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I don’t think I was as fazed by what Sam said as much as the majority of the class was. The topic of homosexuality is one that I am all too familiar with. I’d like to put it out there, like most of us; I was raised by my heterosexual parents in a loving family. While my immediate family was heterosexual, I have been surrounded by gay culture all of my life. I am a theatre major so I live in an environment where the gay population and culture is all around me. Many of my closest friends are gay and for many of them, I was there for their coming out process and so I feel personally connected to this topic. I have one friend in particular who struggled to come out and is still in the process. She lived her whole life thinking that she was straight, attracted to guys and having boyfriends. Until one time last year, she walked into a Starbucks and saw a girl that she was so attracted to, she made the realization then and there that her feelings for this girl were so strong, she had to act on it. The fact that she had a relationship with a girl is something that she struggles to rationalize. As she was explaining this all to me she kept said something that really stuck with me: “it’s not that it means that I am exactly gay, I just feel that you can fall for anyone if they are the right person”. That phrase really stuck with me and made me personally rethink people’s take on sexuality as a whole. I think that Sam is right; many of our parents might be gay but will never come out. In fact I’m going to take it one step further and say that, I agree with the Kinsey Scale of sexuality that says that everyone is a little bit gay. I think that certain people might have repressed homosexual thoughts and because it is against the norm or because they are “happy enough” they don’t feel that they would rather keep the life that they have then act out against the norm of society so they pose as a straight person. Now don’t get me wrong, this is not to say that I think that the world is gay or that I think everyone has gay parents. I just feel that the topic of sexuality might not be as clear cut as people think it is. I think that humans don’t have to be just straight or just gay. I think that the reason so many of us laughed it off when Sam mentioned it in class is because deep down inside there is that little tiny bit of doubt that we are afraid to admit to. Crazy when you think about it. Huh?
Note: I’m sorry if this response is a little far back. I when I was scrolling through the available blogs to respond to, this one jumped out at me and got a burning desire to respond to it.
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When I was a little kid I used to make fun of gay and lesbian people, I did not have a reasonable explication. I could not stand hearing talking or acting a person that is not heterosexual. It bothered me. I developed a feeling of hatred towards them. When I was in middle school back in my country I met a beautiful girl and I wanted to talk to her but it was difficult for me to see and talk to her. Fortunately she had a cousin that was in my one of my classes. So through him I got to know her a little bit better. I used to send her candy with him and love notes. I saw and kissed her after school. Everything was cool but one day he decided to tell me that he was gay from that moment my perspective from him changed. I stopped talking to him even to my girlfriend. I did not want to be associated with him or his family. I guess I was being immature and ignorant. After the school year finished he was gone I never saw him again.
It has to be super hard for a gay or lesbian person get out and admit their sexual orientation. To be accepted for your parents has to be tough especially when they do not know it. Some people may at look at you with disgust others like trying to blame you for being immoral. A couple of years I learned that being homosexual is not a choice I thought they chose to go against their parents and be a rebel but no is been proved that being homosexual or transgender is a medical condition is just part of nature that we sometimes refuse to accept because of our ignorance.
I respect gay and lesbian people now because I have learned to tolerate their way of living and because I learned to be in their skin in their, as them I have been discriminated many times because of my skin color or my ethnicity. Being part of a minority present a lot of challenges and obstacles that are not easy to overcome. I must admit I felt frustrated when I was not allowed to play soccer with some people because I was an immigrant and they only pick their friends. I faced many situations that made me feel discriminated but thanks to those experiences I learned to be strong and smart in some way. I learn to comprehend groups of people that are rejected by society or the public. I guess sometimes a person needs to feel what another person feels to understand their point of view. I don’t mind having gay friends because I know how o appreciate people no matter their sexual orientation.
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