posted by Sam Richards
I’m curious about what you all think of this. The problems of not recognizing same-sex marriage/unions are far ranging and leave deep wounds on many families….and “the children.”
I’m curious about what you all think of this. The problems of not recognizing same-sex marriage/unions are far ranging and leave deep wounds on many families….and “the children.”
I think that being raised helping out in a family Christmas store, I was exposed to and learned to appreciate the gay community basically from birth. Therefore it has been hard for me growing up to see how much discrimination and distrust that exists for people I considered to be my mentors and family friends. I remember when the term “that’s so gay” began to be a popular phrase and it was strictly forbidden in my house because my mom found it so offensive. I was taught that there is nothing wrong with being gay and so I find it hard to see the other side of the argument.
I liked one of the flip-camera comments about gay marriage versus civil unions. I do believe that marriage is an institution of the church and they have the right to marry, or not to marry whomever they choose. However, Sam brought up the point in class that the State does sign off on marriage licenses making them valid in the eyes of the law in this country and therefore marriage is important in defining committed long-term partnerships. But I agree with guy on the flip-camera that the inherent issue here is that the State is signing off on marriages, not civil unions. If you can get a paper from the government stating that you and your chosen life partner have all the same rights as any other committed partnership in the country then I think that should be called something other than a marriage so that it can be equal for any type of couple who wish to legally commit themselves to each other. Leave marriages in the church. If a couple wishes their union to be blessed and approved by God then that should be a different and other transaction than that which is approved by the government. In this way, by redefining “marriage” and “civil union” under the law, we can make things equal for any two-some who wish to commit to each other and can save the sanctity of a religious marriage for those persons and their religious centers who desire it.
I am sure there are plenty of other ways to solve this problem but it seems to me that this would really be a simple and easy change to pitch to the nation. As Sam said in class, we are in no way at the beginning of this civil rights movement, but perhaps it is time to see some tangible results from all the work people have put into changing these laws. I hope that I will be able to see my friends and colleagues and family members commit to a loved one under the law and be equal in the eyes of our government.
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bos5127 Reply:
February 20th, 2010 at 4:28 am
This video is in my opinion is down right wrong. What's the problem with same sex couples living a healthy life? I do understand the whole idea of breaking the union and bond of marriage but all America somehow breaks a law. Who are we to judge and dictate people's lives? The United States does this the time. The problem isn't about single sex couples it's more about what is acceptable in there eyes. This is wrong but it's just one of those things we can't really fix but somehow address it.
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sna5022 Reply:
February 24th, 2010 at 5:40 pm
I think you made some really interesting points. I agree that people should be able to choose whoever they want to spend their lives with, regardless of their sex. It is important for us in the United States to make sure we accept individuals who are different than us and to protect them under the law. I think it was really interesting how you said we should refine the terms “marriage” and “civil union.” This is a really good idea as it would make it much easier for same-sex couples to acknowledge their partnership under God, without going through the hassle of going through the government.
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This is really sad. I'm astonished that there are so many families that are having to deal with something like this and that they are being treated different because they are the same sex. They have the right as any American family to live together and be married and raise a family. They have the right to be people and live their lives like people. I'm surprised that the police system is so forceful with that. They were doing nothing wrong, they are married and she lives with the other woman as a couple, they have children and a home. The only law that they broke was that she was not an american citizen because her married union was not recognized by the state. This isn't fair treatment. I am not against anything that people want to do with their personal lives and if they love each other they have the right to be together and be treated like any other international couple that is heterosexual. I hope that the government soon sees gays as people with rights. After all they are people. They are just as real as any other person on the street. They live, they love and they have dreams and hopes just like every else, they deserve to live them out. People need to give them a chance. If we all have rights, then that means everyone has rights there are no exceptions to freedom and rights.
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I thought America stood for freedom. I guess not. We can legally commit several other sins listed in the bible, but not homosexuality. How is being drunk or committing adultery considered okay but tearing apart a perfectly happy family just because of two same sex parents considered wrong? People should have the right to be happy and marry who they want. Society should not make the rules for them, especially when the members of society have no way of relating to the problems that same sex couples face. The worst part is that children are being torn away from their parents. This woman’s kids had to see her being handcuffed and taken into a van. Why? Because she had to go back to her home country since she could not become legal through marriage with her girlfriend.
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jim5049 Reply:
February 19th, 2010 at 3:41 pm
Yea, it's pretty sad and all, but you can’t say America is not a country that stands for freedom. We stand for freedom, but that doesn’t mean that people are free to do whatever they want. There are still limits. You have to think about that. Sure, being drunk is legal, alcohol is legal, but drinking in public is illegal. Stop for a second and ask yourself why that is. Is it because it is dangerous? Is it because people don’t like it? I don’t know, you tell me. I would say, for the most part, the latter is true of same sex marriages. Lobbyists, beaurocrats, politicians – those are the people that make the laws in this country. The word “freedom” doesn’t make any laws. It’s just there to urge the lawmakers to provide freedoms to the citizens (by the way that girl who actually looks like a girl in the video is not a citizen) of America.
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towhead Reply:
February 19th, 2010 at 8:35 pm
I strongly agree with you. Laws are put in place to provide structure and protect society. Immigrants are given a golden gift by being permitted citizenship through marriage to an existing citizen. These people had kids (adopted?) without first obtaining citizenship for the illegal immigrant of the pair. Choosing to adopt children given their legal circumstances is tantamount to choosing to grow marijuana in your backyard. You hold a belief and you decide that you don’t give a fuck what the law says. When people fully understand the risk before they strike out on the endeavor, why do we always find them crying after they get caught? If I were an illegal immigrant I would hope that I would have the decency to put obtaining citizenship before having children! The couple in the video are absolutely correct when describing how heartbreaking it is to have their family broken up, but not ONCE do they confess that they didn’t give a shit what the law said before creating that family. I find it much more frustrating that these people want the law to bend to them to support their lifestyle and even brought children into their battle, than the fact that the law is being upheld and the illegal is being deported.
According to the statistics in the video, there are some 18,000 families facing a situation similar to the one depicted in the video. How do that many people get the idea that this is ok? If they are adopting, how do they get approved?
Don’t get me wrong, I agree with changing the law to allow this family to stay together. However, I believe taking personal responsibility for your own actions is much more important. This family could be permanently torn apart. NOT because of evil lawmakers, but because of a complete disregard for personal responsibility.
The issue of gay marriage must be resolved first. The fact that this couple has children is irrelevant. Nowhere in the constitution does it actually say “separation of church and state”. An online source states, “The First Amendment to the Constitution states "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof…" This prevents the government from establishing a national church. However, it does not prevent God from being acknowledged in schools and government buildings.” (http://www.studentnewsdaily.com/other/conservativ... Therefore the church’s position of not allowing gay marriage must be respected. Another type of union may be more appropriate and more widely accepted.
This video disgusts me more than saddens me.
If immigrants come here to seek opportunity and a better life, they need to do so legally. If the life they wish to live is not supported by law, they need to fight to get the law changed, just like everyone else.
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kml5139 Reply:
February 19th, 2010 at 10:34 pm
This comment just made me want to learn more detail about how the women went about to get these sons- are they biological or adopted? If adopted, I'm surprised the couple was able to adopt while one of them was an immigrant. In fact, I don't even know what legislation exists regarding non-citizens adopting children in the US. Anyways, I do agree with the previous poster. When this couple made the life-lasting decision to start a family, I'm so surprised they didn't think about the issue of citizenship before doing so. While this case is so sad, and I fully believe the one partner should be able to stay especially regarding the danger she would be in back in the Philippines, the topic will always go back to why she hadn't confronted the issue years ago.
jpm5107 Reply:
February 20th, 2010 at 2:45 am
This situation would have never happened if she didn’t come to this country illegally. Now she’s ruining the lives of three other people. It is especially sad since there are two kids involved. You could tell from the video that they were emotionally hurt from the whole thing. If people could marry who ever they wanted to this country would be going downhill. Lets just stick to the classic marriage man and woman. It has worked for our society for centuries and should continue that way. Gay marriage will do more harm than good. Like this story the children will be the ones affected the most for no reason.
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TennisGirl22 Reply:
February 20th, 2010 at 3:48 am
I absolutely agree. There is an awful lot of hypocrisy in America. In class, Sam showed a comic that showed all the different ways the institution of marriage is not taken seriously. It had a picture of a couple getting married from a game show, a drunk couple in Vegas, an elderly wealthy man with a young beautiful (gold digging) wife, a phony politician and his commercialized wife. Society sees all of these unions as acceptable, yet sincere love between a gay couple is unworthy of being formally recognized.
I firmly believe that one day, hopefully sooner than I anticipate, gay couples will be granted the right to marry. I feel that after this day comes, decades from now, our grandchildren will find it hard to believe that it was ever so frowned upon. They will look at the unequal rights for gays the way our generation looks at the segregation in the 50s and 60s. It is hard for me to imagine a time when African American students were sent to separate schools, couldn’t sit on public buses, drink from water fountains, or eat at certain restaurants. In the same way, our grandchildren will have a hard time believing that their friend, Joey’s dads were at one time in history not allowed to be together.
As critical as I am about the issue, I must say that I feel society’s attitude now is better than it ever was before. We are becoming more and more socially liberal. We are more accepting of gays. Although we have not granted them the rights they deserve, I personally do not feel that gay people are shunned or that they experience any prejudice. Although I am not gay, so it is hard for me to attest to this.
One of my best friends from home is gay. We all knew it throughout high school, but he waited until college to come out. He didn’t necessarily lie and pretend to be straight, but he never talked to any of us about his sexuality, and did not act on it until he was 6 hours away from home in Boston. I will never forget when we first saw each other over winter break freshman year in college. He “came out of the closet” to me, but it was almost amusing because I already knew. I could feel a physical pain in my chest for him when he told me how terrible it was telling his parents, how he was afraid his mother would never talk to him again, how his father wouldn’t look him in the eye. All of the suffering he was going through reinforced my belief that this is not the lifestyle someone choose- all the more reason why we shouldn’t punish them for it.
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klpeace1 Reply:
February 27th, 2010 at 3:20 am
I could not agree more with this. We are tearing apart good and happy families based on a law that is religious in nature. It really isn't fair to say that America doesn't stand for freedom. There are just flaws in the system, which we need to work hard to correct. We have separation of church and state for a reason and we need to remember that. We need to fix our laws where we have failed and give rights to couples who want to spend their lives together and have loving families, regardless of gender. Gay marriage is about love and denying people the rights which we ALL deserve as Americans.
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This is a very emotional video. I think it portrays immigrantion in a completely different light. I think that the United States has a long way to go before situations like this one will be legislatively resolved. I find it amazing that decisions like this can't be overturned. I know every immigrant has their own situation, but where is the person enforcing this law? Obviously on a first hand basis even the agents that transport this mother must feel terrible with the situation, but why isn't there someone who can override this case. I just find it overwhelming that this mother can be torn away from her children with little to no sympathy from anyone at the Federal level.
I think one of the problems with this specific issue is it brings together the forefront of two political hot topics that get much angst and fever over from capital hill to the farm town. One thing that really stood out to me is the number of families this affects. I believe the video said 36,000 families. You would think with a national divorce rate of what nearly 50% you would see some government intervention in this matter.
I think the United States has a long way to come before situations like this one in particular will be resolved. Immigrant issues and same sex marriage or union issues haven't been resolved yet in their respective corners much less together. As far as the media goes I think stories like these take a backseat to the issues separately. This video is very moving, and I think that if more people saw it, they might realize the hypocrisy of both these laws.
I think this video is influential in demonstrating that the United States doesn't necessarily support the family unit as much as we'd like to think we would. Yeah financial support is great with home buying credits, and child care credits, but as far as keeping families together, forget about that.
Sam brought up an interesting point the other day in class when he was talking about the sin. To paraphrase he said something to the affect of getting drunk is just as much of a sin as same sex marriage would be. How would some of these politicians feel if their family was taking away from them for some legislative loop-hole that bureaucrats pick and choose who and when to enforce this law.
I'm not really enlightened in the area of American citizhen laws. But if this mother whether biological or not, provides the basic necessities for her AMERICAN BORN children why are they being taken away? This just blows my mind, that just because a parent isn't an American citizhen he or she can't protect his or her child(ren).
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This is terrible. It is so sad to think about how many children are currently in the foster care system, and to then think that here is a very happy two-parent family who has to deal with the possibility of being torn apart. The fact that this family and others like them are targeted because they are same-sex couples boggles my mind. I don’t understand where the United States government gets off thinking that they can tell someone what it means to be a family. If a gay couple wants to have a family, and wants to adopt children, they are giving children a better life than these kids could’ve ever had otherwise. Also, who is to say that homosexuals can’t parent with the same abilities if not better that straight parents have. No one can say what a ‘family” should look like. Some families have straight parents and some have same sex parents, others have one parents, some have divorced parents; some families have one child, while others have a dozen. A family can be whatever you want to make it, gay or straight.
I guess you can already tell that I 100% support gay marriage. That’s right, marriage, not unions or any other fancy term that people want to conjure up to make their marriages seem any less legitimate than those of straight couples. If two people, ANY two people love each other and want to commit to spending their lives together, I don’t understand how anyone whether it be the government, the church, or otherwise should be able to stand in the way of that. If people are opposed to gay marriage, they don’t have to partake in it, but who is anyone to tell other people how to love.
In the case of this video, it is ridiculous that families can get torn apart because one parent is an illegal immigrant. I have never heard of such a thing happening to families with straight parents. Just because these families happen to have same sex parents is no reason for them to be a target to the government. If the government is going to go after illegal immigrants, the same rules should apply for both gay and straight couples. I feel this way not only about deportation, but about all laws. Rules should not be different depending on whether a couple is gay or straight. Whether gay or straight, I don’t think that tearing a family apart should ever be the answer. I think the government should make exceptions to immigration laws so that families will always be able to stay together. For this family, they probably deal with enough having same-sex parents that having their family separated after everything they’ve been through to be a family is the last thing they should ever have to deal with.
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This didn't even occur to me as a potential problem of the United States not recognizing same-sex marriages.
Being from Hawaii, where many, many, many first generation immigrants and children of those first generation immigrants reside, I'm very aware of the reasons why people emigrate from countries around the world. Most of the immigrants that I know came to the United States of America with hopes that doing so would offer them more opportunity, stability, and security than their home countries could offer.
It never occurred to me that some of these people are homosexual, or that a good handful of those are likely to find partners here in the United States. It saddens me that our country would deny these people all of the things that they came here for, simply because of their sexual preferences.
My mother, herself, is a first generation immigrant to the United States. She left Japan to study in America, so it's not quite like she left out of any dire need to do so. She doesn't work in America, so the only reason that she is able to reside here as a legal Alien is because of the visa that she is given by the United States thanks to her marriage to my father; without it, she would be deported in three months, because that is all a tourist visa- all she would be able to attain- would allow. I can't begin to imagine how devastated I would be if I knew that my mother would be deported, or what it would be like to have to go home on the breaks between semesters to a home without her. It's devastating to think that this is the reality that many children– even more so for those that are very young– must face, and consequently learn to cope with.
I have three friends– they're triplets– whose mother, Veronica, is a lesbian. They reside with their mother and her partner, Charlotte. Thanks to them, I have learned and seen the kinds of problems that denying same-sex marriage can cause. Because Charlotte and Veronica cannot get married, Charlotte cannot be considered one of their "parents." Because Charlotte and Veronica cannot get married, there are many financial problems that most heterosexual, married couples will typically not have to face. Luckily, Charlotte and Veronica are both United State Citizens, though, so they will never have to face the possibility of deportation. Knowing them, though, does help me give a face to this issue. What if one of them were to ever be deported? I can only imagine that it would devastate their family, as well as their well being.
I don't necessarily know anyone that faces all three components of this problem– immigrating, deportation, and homosexuality– but I do know people that face each of these challenges individually. They're all difficult things to cope with to begin with, and I can't imagine what it would be like to face all three of them at the same time, or even to be one of those that would be affected by them by association. For a country that values its families so much, I hope that they will rectify this issue as soon as possible, so that families, even those with homosexual parents, will be able to stay together and prosper.
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What’s most astounding about this story is that they would try to deport the mother from a two-parent family. The United States is trying so hard to encourage two-parent families and spending a substantial amount of money on research that finds the benefits of having two parents in a family that is raising children. But yet, they’re still eagerly trying to deport this mother of two. Also, you can tell that the incident where the boys’ mother was getting arrested really upset her sons. It’s ridiculous that the United States would rather deport this non-citizen mother than recognize a same-sex union, which would allow her to stay with her family and continue promoting such a healthy environment with two-parents.
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evelynlizette Reply:
February 20th, 2010 at 2:17 am
This story is unfortunate and i agree that it seems hypocritical of the United States to encourage two parent families and then completely tear a family apart because of a mother's deportation status. The fight for equal rights for the LGBT community is not going to happen over night but there is a high demand for change from this community and its supporters. If this family's mother was able to be petitioned to become a citizen by her partner, then the children would not have suffered as much as I can imagine they did. Seeing your mother arrested by cops at such a young age is traumatizing. Its hard for a single parent of whatever sexual preference to handle. The partner that didn't get arrested is an American citizen and as with all American citizens, they have the right to petition their married significant other. The only difference in this situation is that the couple is a same sex couple. They still have a loving family, from what the video clip showed, that they want to keep together at any cost. I could not begin to imagine the pain the family is going through especially with the new dynamics of the family since it is now a single parent house hold.
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sna5022 Reply:
February 24th, 2010 at 5:45 pm
I agree with you about how absolutely ridiculous it is to try to deport a mother of a two-parent family. This family is doing nothing differently than the traditional family, other than the fact that both parents happen to be the same sex. I don’t think any of us are able to say what is wrong and what is right. People should be able to pick whoever they want as their partner. I also thought it was heartbreaking to watch the son who got very emotional as he was talking about his mother getting arrested. These boys were brought up in a house in which they love both of their parents and it is not fair to take one of their parents away from them.
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First off, that first asian girl that was interviewed looks like a dude. Clearly we can tell who’s pitching and catching here. When they get to talking about how the girl who wanted to marry the other girl couldn’t get citizenship through marriage, it makes sense to me. I mean, gay marriages are only recognized in a few states – the liberal ones.
So, normally, a person who is not a citizen of the United States could come from wherever they are from, get into the United States somehow (I have no idea how, maybe a visa or something), and meet someone they like. Then, if this person likes them back, I guess they can get married to that person who happens to be a citizen of the United States, and they become a citizen themselves. I mean, clearly this couldn’t happen here, because gay marriages aren’t allowed in most states. My advice at this point (I have the video paused at 1:00) is to move to a state that accepts and provides marriages for gays. Like really, if you’re gay, why not?
Now, the one who looks like a boy has called the other one that actually does look like a girl family. This is a little bit of a stretch for me. The boy one said that “[her] family is getting torn apart, and you don’t do that to a family.” Well, I have news for you, boy girl, you’re not a family. If you’re not related through marriage or blood, you’re not technically family. So I guess by that definition, those kids that you have been raising are not really your family either. But let’s not get into that, after all, they’re already American citizens, so it doesn’t really matter, does it? Since I was young, I’ve had relatives that I call “Aunt Connie, Uncle Chuck, etc. They are not really my family. They are the best friends of my parents from when my father was in grad school. The thing is, I realize this. I realize that they are not family. Although my parents are close with them, they don’t lie to themselves and say that they are actual family. Quite the opposite – they told us (my brothers and I when we were young) that they are not technically our family. I think it’s stupid to pretend people are your family when they really are not. You can say they are “like” your family – I’m fine with that – just don’t lie to yourselves and to other people. And if you really want them to be your family, please just go to a state that respects same sex unions, and get a union. Stop complaining, because although I don’t agree with it, same sex marriages will unfortunately probably be legal in most of the fifty states soon enough. Keep your junk in your pants, gays.
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Cxmaddox96 Reply:
February 23rd, 2010 at 2:24 am
I can see where your coming from when you say that these two women and two children are not "technically family", but you are assuming that they don't “know” that they are not illegally a family by law. You said, "…they are the best friends of my parents from when my father was in grad school. The thing is, I realize this. I realize that they are not family." You say this like you know for a fact that they do not know they are not a family.
Now that I got that out of the way I would like to ask, what is your exact definition of family? Why don't you look it up? I did (dictionary.com) and there are twenty different ways the word family is defined and only ONE out of the entire twenty definitions considers family being blood related. Here is the first way it is defined; –noun 1.a. A basic social unit consisting of parents and their children, considered as a group, whether dwelling together or not: the traditional family.
b. A social unit consisting of one or more adults together with the children they care for: a single-parent family.
You said, “You can say they are “like” your family – I’m fine with that – just don’t lie to yourselves and to other people.” There is no reason for this couple to say they are “like” family when that is truly not how they see themselves. They function like a family, take care of children, love their children est.…there is nothing different. Are you going to tell me that a straight couple cannot consider each other family because they are not married and both adults aren’t biologically parents of the children being taken care of in the household? Even if they have cohabited for more the ten or fifteen years? What if they have grandchildren as well, this is still not a “real family” to you? Oh, please!
Second, if you are going to create an argument and you want people to take seriously, don't start off by stating a point less fact like, "that first asian girl that was interviewed looks like a dude." What does that have to do with the fact that they cannot marry? Or comments like "keep your junk in your pants, gays." Really? Come on.
Finally, I do agree when you say that the couple should move to a state where they can get a union or officially marry. Yes, it will be a huge hassle (my personal opinion is that they should not have to go through this to get married) but this is the way it is and for now I suppose it is the best solution (this is assuming that marriage unions allow immigrants to stay in the country.)
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I never believed that if a person married a person in the USA they should be allowed to stay as a citizen, but that’s not the point being made here. Regardless if the family was a heterosexuality married couple they clearly have the right to live in the USA as a family. I believe the problem lies right in the last sentence I wrote. Why does a family have to categories as heterosexuality or homosexuality? A family should only be judge when something in family is going wrong neither, heterosexuality and homosexuality is right or wrong. So let us judge from the video rather this family should be ripped apart. Now a day for a family to remain together for 20 years is remarkable. Love is the answer for them 20 years, love for the kids and love for each other. The one partner is in the USA for the safely of her life both her mother and sister were murder in her native country and the murderer was being released. Not only were they going to deport her from her family in the USA, but to where she had no family. This family lives a normal life just as every other loving family does in the USA. The US should stop focusing on breaking up families who has a clear reason to be here and start focusing on how to put more family together. A few classes ago Sam Richard made the statement about how some same sex couples are not allowed to adopt children or it’s extremely difficult. If some of the hard work was refocused on helping same sex couples adopt orphans it would build stronger families in the USA.
This immigration problem falls back on same sex marriage. As the law state there is separation of church and state, which is not the case in almost all the states. If two random drunk people can get married in Las Vegas (who knows the countless sins they both already committed), why can’t two loving people with two loving children be married. I’m sure the world not going to end when same sex couples are allowed to marry. It’ll just end tomorrow.
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The video is definitely depressing. As people have said, immigration is really portrayed here in a different light. You do not realize how many families suffer from the same or a similar problem. Personally, I don’t mind gay/same-sex marriage. It is not an issue for me, so I really find it hard to understand why some people are not able to recognize and respect a legitimate partnership between two people. I mean they would rather deport this woman, which would separate her from her two children and partner, than recognize a same-sex union. It is ridiculous. I’m curious to where this family stands as of now.
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I just feel struggle with LGBT issues and stand on a strange position when I face this topic. I am Christian, who is having strong faith in God. Same sex family for my faith is sin; this is the thing God won’t allow any His children to do. I am an obedient child, so for me, this is truth. I just cannot give up my faith because of anything, this is so important for me. I got lots of hurt and rejection in the past, however God healed all my hurt and give a new life to me, and I cannot live without Him. So, I choose to trust LGBT is wrong. You know, sometimes, the question only has two choices, I have to choose one. I am not meaning that the other answer is wrong, but what I choose is make for sense for me, and only for me.
I cannot say gay people are by genetic reason or by their choices, because I am a straight, I have no idea what is going on in their mind or life. This video makes me sad; I think is so mean to catch the mother and force her to deport. Only based on this situation, I support her to gain her right. She could stay in the United State and live with their “family”. However, I cannot accept their definition of family. From my point of view, couples have to be one male and one female. I just can’t accept same sex marriage or family. However, I understand their need and wants. I understand her feeling about her family, I willing to help her to be with their family based on my emotion. I have a soft heart, and want other people have a happy life. However, this is wrong in my logic. I have nothing to say, because this put me into a strange position. I am not that kind ruthless person, but I have to insist on my faith in God.
This winter break, I went to another state for a Christian conference. I heard a really strong testimony form a gay boy. He is about my age, and was a gay in his past 18 years. However, he got healed by God. Now, he is a straight and like girls. I cannot say that gay people are mentally ill; however there is something wrong inside their soul and body. God has the power to help and heal them. Tell us LGBT is sin is not because God is merciless. He knows all these people’s pain and struggle, why not let God to help. If you really put your faith in Him, he can do everything you think is impossible. I want to tell all the gay people, His love is the only solution. Please give Him a chance to love you and heal you.
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I think this whole situation is ridiculous for a few reasons. First off, if the government is going to allow people to become citizens because of a heterosexual marriage, they have to allow this for homosexual marriages. As seen in the video, this family was doing extremely well for themselves. I would argue that they are closer as a family than most heterosexual parent run families are. The children were very upset about their mother being taken, and it’s going to rip them apart inside knowing that their mother got dejavascript:%20postComment(0);ported because of her beliefs. I really don’t believe the government should grant citizenship to people who aren’t citizens and get married to someone who is. It only brings more people into the country that are getting citizenship the easy way. They get around the whole process of citizenship without having to do anything.
Putting myself in one of their children’s shoes, I would be devastated to lose a parent to something as ridiculous as this. It would affect the children’s health both mentally and physically in a negative way for a very long time. Something they have seen and known as normal for their entire lives is suddenly being ripped away from them and it messes with their psyche. They may start believing that they don’t belong in this country like they are told their mother is not. There is a lot of discrimination going on which is only making their lives tougher. I am sure they hear about this issue at school all the time and get bullied and ridiculed for it, so they look at home as a safe haven to get away from all of the controversy. The fact that home is no longer like this is very detrimental to their life.
The children are definitely the losers in this situation. Yes, the mother is getting deported and being told her sexuality is at fault for it, however the kids have to deal with not having a mother when they have been used to it their whole lives. Losing a parent is traumatizing enough whether it is a heterosexual, homosexual, or one parent family.
The United States definitely push two parent families over anything else, and the fact that they are personally going against this by getting rid of a parent is totally against what they believe in. There are many studies which show that children in two parent families are much better off than children in one parent families. The children were clearly happy in the situation they were in, along with being raised and treated extremely well. It is unfair to them to take this away from them because of some dumb idea the government has about what is right and wrong.
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Come on! How are we supposed to have an intelligent conversation about this when sensationalized propaganda garbage like this is posted? This is no better than showing a segment from the "700 Club" and making some sort of Christian zealot point. It's all emotion, there's no rational argument here. We aren't given any circumstance other than the supposed wrongs that have been committed to this family. Is the fact that the woman's parents were murdered really relevant? Do we really need to see the boys playing tennis and smiling? Why did people break into their house? What happened? What were the terms of her threat of deportation? This video leaves so much important information out and gives us an ideal family, victimized by some faceless, oppressive government. It's not so cut and dry people. Linking LGBT issues with race relations is already stretching it quite a bit. This movie just throws in another complex issue, immigration, into the mix. We can't just pile on all these mostly unrelated issues and expect to solve anything. It's like saying that my father was a lefty who grew up going to Catholic school. He was discriminated against too, can we have a class about lefties? Is this class about "RACE Relations" or about people who get discriminated against?
I am for gay marriage, equal rights and what have you. I am against the dissemination of propaganda posing as informative media, just to stir up comments…especially in the context of a pedagogical setting like this.
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I was very surprised that this was going on and actually happening to such a large number of people. It is very unfortunate that this family and others like them had to go through such a difficult ordeal. Had the United States legally recognized their marriage, she would not need to even worry about the possibility of being deported. If this situation was a man and a woman from another country, their children would never see these problems either because she would have become a legal United States citizen the minute she was married. This was a loving family that was ripped apart at a time when the government is promoting two parent households because of the positive effect it has on the children. Seeing one of your parents forcefully taken out of your home by police is definitely not a positive event. I do not understand how the United States policies can be so contradicting. They want two parent households, but will not recognize same sex marriages or unions. People in these situations cannot get the same benefits as people in a marriage between a man and a woman. People who want to enter into same sex marriages and unions are basically being told that they are not as deserving of the same basic human rights as those who are heterosexual. The United States supposedly is a place that is accepting of people from all different walks of life and backgrounds. This is another time when we are being hypocritical of that ideal by not completely accepting people who want to marry their partner and obtain full rights in the eyes of the government. There are also many states that do not allow same sex couples to adopt. There are many instances where these same sex couples would probably be better parents than some heterosexual couples. If they are willing to adopt a child and give them a loving stable home, who is to say they should not be allowed to do so. There are so many children without a home it is completely irrational to not allow this. I feel the same way as one of the girls in the flip videos from class. How do people not see how important it is to support the idea of allowing gay couples to receive full rights in the eyes of the government? Even if you do not agree with it, you should step back and think about how you would feel if you were thought of as less of a person simply because of whom you loved. We need our policies to match the accepting attitude we preach and give people in same sex marriages and unions the rights that they absolutely deserve.
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I still can not believe in this day in age that gay marriage or civil unions are still an issue. Call it whatever you want to call it, say that its because of “religious beliefs,” whatever the issue may be, it is absolutely horrific that in 2010 families are being torn apart (and this is not the worst case the country has seen,) because gay rights are not valued or upheld.
I have read some of the comments about this video, and I did not even think about it at first but I do think it is ridiculous that videos like this are being posted because they do simply pull on emotions and we are not met with any of the other information that could potentially change the circumstances. However, at the same time, these videos are necessary and they need to be emotional so that people realize the importance of these situations and how much they affect real people and their families.
On a separate note, the one thing about gay rights that offends me to no end is the religious argument against it. The Christian argument that homosexuality is against their religion is a valid argument and has sustenance TO THE INDIVIDUAL. I completely support, understand and respect the religious arguments against homosexuality on a person-to-person basis. However, when religion is used a supporting reason against legislation for gay rights, it is my personal belief that it is hypocritical, unnecessary and under-representative of the American population as a diverse nation supportive of various values and beliefs. If homosexuality is against one's own personal religion then it is understandable, even important that the individual does not support gay rights and is not gay themselves. However, this country was founded on the principles of separation of church and state and no established religion. Therefore, religion is not a valid argument for any government policies or legislation, or at least it shouldn’t be, when the entire country has a multitude of different religious beliefs. What about those people who do not believe in Christianity and do not feel that homosexuality is against their religion? If they so choose to be gay, why can’t they? Their religious beliefs do not tell them that it is a sin.
Technically, a lot of things can be against your religion. If you are Christian, then wearing a yarmulke is “against your religion.” If you are Jewish, praying to Allah is “against your religion.” If you are Muslim, celebrating Channukah is “against your religion.” Should all people who hold different religious and spiritual beliefs be denied basic human rights (like marriage) as well, simply because it is different from the general majority? It is just hard for me to see the side against legalizing gay marriage, especially because of the main argument on the basis of religion. Not all gay people are of the same religion. Not all gay people believe in religion at all. Not all PEOPLE believe in religion. People are people when it comes down to it, gay, religious, or otherwise… the government has no right to interfere with people's lives, especially involving religion, when individual actions are not causing any harm. Gay marriage should be legal based on the fundamental values of happiness. That all families have the right to happiness, and the government has the responsibility to protect that right.
This video is just another example of how strongly people are affected by simple laws that we all take for granted, including all of the important basic human rights that come along with a simple government document regarding an individual’s “marriage” to another.
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When raising children it is important that the children are in a loving, productive, and positive environment. There are a number of people in the United States that are against the idea or concept of children that are raised by same-sex parents and families. Here in this video, we have a perfect example of a perfect family where the children are loved, taken care for, and live in a productive and growing environment, but are raised by two women that are partners. Throughout the video, we are told and can see the truth that these children and this family in general is very happy and are living in a state of love and passion. They attend school, church, and family and recreational event s like every other family and children in the U.S. I am a firm believer that same-sex marriages and family are not getting equal treatment and rights when it comes to marriage and raising a family. The fact of the matter is that people are people regardless of their sexual orientation. There is a constant stigma in the U.S. that same-sex families produce or encourage children to become homosexual or have different sexual orientation then other children that are raised by straight families. This argument is completely absurd and bogus.
The fact is that homosexual people and people of different sexual orientation come from straight families and people that are heterosexual. If the so-called “normal” family produces children that are of different sexual orientation then it is clear to see that there is no difference between families. Furthermore, there must be a recognition and reality that at the end of the day, people are people. Every human being on this Earth has a level of value and dignity because they are indeed human. Another fact that must be recognized is that there is only so much time that each and every human being has in the bedroom or experience a sexual experience. The comments and arguments against people of different sexual orientation are very over sexualized and often only deal with one aspect of the relationship, which is the sexual side of the relationship. They disregard the fact that these people live everyday lives and the only difference with them is the type of person they are attracted to. Each and every person in the world should be allowed to be attracted to whomever they please and be able to raise children if they please. The idea/concept of heterosexuality is socially constructed to be the “right” or “correct” direction to take when one is pursuing a relationship. We must realize that all regardless of one’s sexual orientation they have something to offer society and can positively impact our society.
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This is an interesting issue and it is certainly a different outlook on the whole idea of gay marriage. I don’t really hold a serious opinion on the issue of gay marriage but like some people I was merely against the idea of calling it marriage for a while. I have since decided that particular outlook is wrong and I am ok with gay marriage. I cannot necessarily say that I am comfortable with the idea but I am ok with it. I believe that people should be able to do what they wish and that they should be able to lead happy lives. This issue of breaking families up and deporting people is wrong and really opens my eyes to why these people should be allowed civil unions of some sort. Even if the particular state in question is not allowing marriage of same sex couples these individuals should be protected in some way and allowed to remain with their families. This also does become more of an immigration issue as opposed to just a same sex marriage one. I do not think it is right that these people allow this to get quite as far as it does. This woman is obviously not paying attention to her own situation if she allows it to go as far as her being handcuffed and taken away by the authorities. She knew that she was an immigrant and just like every other immigrant in this country she has to file the proper paperwork and receive the proper visas to stay in this country, something it seems as if she did not do. She could attempt to become a US citizen and then she could stay in the country. You can of course place much blame on the US government for not going as far as recognizing same sex partners but I do believe that this couple should have been aware of their own situation. Laws take time to change, especially ones that are this sensitive to the people of the country. I think that this couple should have been aware of the fact that the law was the way it was, whether or not it was fair. You cannot expect to just beat the system because like we saw it will catch up with you. Now I am not saying that I do not believe that same sex couples should receive the rights that they deserve and that this situation shouldn’t occur anyway I am merely saying that I feel as if the couple was somewhat negligent in their knowledge of the laws and their own situation. It is not right to break up families in anyway and this situation could be avoided if the US government moved in a new direction.
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After this week's discussion group, Sam's class, and watching this video, my thoughts on the LGBT community have greatly expanded. I am now aware of many different perspectives and a lot more comfortable with the idea of gay marriage. I am now starting to realize that people don't necessarily choose who they are attracted to, it just happens. The fact that America is coined "The land of the free" but there are still issues like this going on in our world, makes me think twice. Why can't people do what they want, without the government telling them what is right and what is wrong? Somewhere throughout the history of the earth, someone/s decided that males should be attracted to females and females should be attracted to males. But say the tables were turned and that those people decided it was also okay for people to be attracted to the same sex. If throughout history, being attracted to a male while being a male was just as common as a male being attracted to a female then the LGBT community would probably be just about as large at the straight community. It would be a very common to see these couples in everyday activity and it would be the norm. Going back to the video, with having this whole new understanding, I do not think it is fair that the mother was deported because of her sexual orientation, especially when she has a family to take care of. Once the immigration law is passed, I believe that a lot more immigrants will come out being gay. It is not fair that these people have to live in fear because of the people they are attracted to. It is not fair for anyone to judge them on their lifestyle; it would be equivalent for someone to judge my mother and father for being married. Everyone has a right to choose, a right to have a family, and a right to be happy. Who are we to judge them for that, let alone strip them of that? There are many heterosexual people in the world, young and old, that should not be creating families that already HAVE families, and there are many homosexual people in the world, that are completely qualified for creating families and not being allowed to. It all comes down to this: children are usually put up for adoption because they cannot be properly cared for. When adoption agencies and other people deny homosexual couples the chance of adoption, they are also taking away the opportunity of that child to be properly cared for. Many people believe that a child being raised by homosexual parents will be made fun of and tormented throughout life, but if you were to ask that child if they are willing to risk that chance of abuse compared to not being part of a family at all, what do you think they would choose?
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This is a really sad video. I never thought about the issues of deportation being tied in with same sex marriages. It is sad that these families are being torn apart and especially with the young kids involved. Which is more traumatic for the child; being in a family that has 2 moms, or having one of the stable adults in their life being stripped away from them for reasons that other moms and dads of heterosexual marriages don't have to deal with.
Being a college student, I barely ever turn on news or even look beyond the problems, papers, tests, class, etc. that are going on in my own life. It is mind blowing that families that are homosexual and foreign to our country can be torn apart legally without a lawsuit or even a plea.
I feel like most families who are gay and have children actually WANT their children. It is the people who shouldn't be legally able to have children that we should deport really. The lives of the children in gay homes are much more safe and loved than many children who grow up in broken homes where no one loves them, and so on. But as blind Americans we see all gay people as pedophiles who shouldn't be in a room with children let alone raise one of their own. Gay people aren't pedophiles in any way. They like men and not women, or women and not men.
Although the popular belief is that gay people are pedophiles, it has nothing really to do with our system of deportation. Deportation is very common and I have actually experienced it. When I was a sophomore in high school, where I worked there were some Mexican people. The police came there and asked if the one guy, Hosea, was there. He actually wasn't and had called in sick. Well after that I never saw him again. He wasn't gay and he did have a family who also was deported except for the baby. It is so sad that they were just taken out of the country, but I guess if America let just anyone in we would be as overcrowded as China, but with much less employment. Many immigrants get married to citizens to stay here in legal status. Gay couples don't have this right, along with many other rights. If they aren't able to be married (civil unioned?) then they have no protection from the law. I like to think that we are moving away from being a controlling country and only allow what we want the ideal to be, but we are not. Maybe we should start to be accepting of these people who only have a different sexual desire and let them be who they are. Then we will be America, land of the free, home of everyone!
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This is quite a sad story. I hope that the UAFA law is passed, but I doubt that it will, considering the views of many people who decide the laws. From my view, it isn't really the citizens who decide the laws in America, they have a small amount of input in the process. It is the people with money, in our corporatocracy who decide what goes and what doesn't.
As far as the arguments against allowing same-sex marriages to be recognized, they are all illogical, as Sam Richards explained in class. Firstly, the children in the families do not have a larger chance of being gay (not that thats a bad thing), nor do they have a larger risk for any big problems. I know two girls who were brought up by lesbian parents, and they have no problems socializing or doing other things that kids do. Also, when people argue that gay marriage ruins the sanctity between a man and woman, there are flaws as well. If regular marriage is so sacred, then why do we allow there to be game shows, celebrity marriages, and also why is there around a fifty per cent divorce rate in America.
I think what we really need are honest, compassionate relationships with all beings, male or female, human and nonhuman. I think the problem today is that our ways of relating to each other and the world are dominated by our egoic minds. Our egoic minds see oneself as a discrete separate being interacting with others. From this egoic perspective, we should each maximize our power and pleasure by manipulating others, who are almost always a threat to us in one way or another. I think that being mainly ruled by this mindset is what breeds all the craziness and dogmatism today. We fear change and the unknown, and our egoic minds fear to realize that we are so much more than they have it to be. I think that genuinely addressing this part of our minds, and coming to understand it is key in opening up to issues like gay rights and gay acceptance. I think the Jimi Hendrix quote is applicable here: "When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace."
Also related to gay marriage and our population issues, we need loving adults who are not going to have excessive children. And as Sam Richards said in class, if gays are to have kids, it is always very deliberate and not accidental. Peace
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What a horribly sad story. This once-happy family with two loving parents and a wonderful set of twin boys is torn apart because of the ignorance of the immigration laws. Not only was it hard to listen to the pain of the mother about losing her family, but also to hear the grief that the sons went through. To witness their innocent and loving mother get handcuffed and taken away for no real reason is unimaginable and terrorizing for such a young kid. There was nothing wrong with this family. These twin boys had two loving parents, which statistically is better than living in a single parent home.
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I should have seen an article like this coming, but it’s definitely new to see it from a different perspective and in a way that I didn't necessarily think happened. Besides one of their mother's being abducted during the middle of the night, handcuffed and about to be deported, I think that would be considered a little excessive and problematic for the same sex couples. I mean in some states they do have the right to marry but aren't given the same privileges, as I see some comedians telling jokes such as "married people are miserable, if gays and lesbians want to be miserable too, might as well let em" but I think there is also the opposite end when some are actually happy to be with their spouse and they should not be denied that same right, as it says "the pursuit of happiness" in the constitution. They judge marriage on faith but of which faith you must be in order to get married, last I checked not all religions have bans on same sex marriages but the US does because the majority is catholic so they all got to be mindless and follow the word of the church. It’s funny how people can't think for themselves in these kinds of situations and leave people like this getting the very short end of the stick.
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Wow, that video was intense. I never once gave thought to LGBQT issues revolving around American citizenship and being gay or lesbian. It was so surreal when the mother got deported in the end. I thought that it was one of those clips where everything starts out sad but then there is a happy ending. To find out that America would actually deport someone because they don’t have citizenship in this country even though they would technically have it if they were straight, is disgusting.
I just don’t understand why it is such a big deal to give them citizenship status. It wouldn’t have hurt anyone. Versus there other decision. No good can come from separating a family like that. When I saw the little boy crying my heart almost broke.
It’s like we live in the country of freedom. We are not supposed to have any religious affiliations when it comes to government. Yet it is everywhere that we turn. For instance, on our money it says “In God we trust” and children are required to sing the pledge of alliance which talks about god. It’s like in this country that we are basing our laws off of Christianity rather than what is truly best for the American citizens.
It seems like there has to be some middle ground that we can find here. I know that most people have a hard time excepting gay marriage but maybe instead of just having the title of married, gay and lesbian couples can instead enjoy some of the benefits that come along with being married. Such as tax breaks and citizenship for your spouse if you are already American yourself. I just really don’t get why this is an issue. It just seems like gay and lesbian rights are not coming fast enough. But then again I take a look at the black civil rights movement and it took years for blacks to achieve the current status that they have now.
I just feel like if the organizations that fight for civil rights for LGBQT people showed videos such as the one above then there would be more response. It’s like when you walk down Polluck road and see the people with the anti abortion signs. Sure, it’s out there and can be a bit disturbing to take in at first but you have to admit that they defiantly get their point across and that the idea sticks with you. I just don’t know what it is going to take to get the American government to see that gay marriage is not such a crime. Maybe a few more hundred broken gay and lesbian families?
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From the anthropologist's aspect, the issue of gay/les marriage is wrong because the couple won't biologically have baby– this makes it unacceptable by the tribes and societies in ancient times. But time has changed– in nowadays society we don't need to keep everyone creating babies–not like primitives that there were only very small number of people and they need to keep everyone "productive"… so why not breaking the chains of morality on us? Shouldn't we just be a bit more generous and open minded? I strongly support gay/les marriage not only because of the issue listed in this blog, but also because it is just a family format! It won't bother anyone. And gays and lesbians are just sexually different to us and nothing more.
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That was completely eye-opening. I had no idea that the immigration laws of this country even didn't accept same-sex partnerships as a reasonalbe grounds rto ask for someone to stay in this country. I am completely shocked actually, even though I really shouldn't be since the majority of issues revolving around same -sex anything are having to do with the government not accepting it. I think that what is happening to that family is tragic to say the least. They seem like a very loving family with a very strong support system within themselves. The fact taht the immigration laws in the united states sdo not appreciate a family trying to stay together and stay stong, now that just seems plain wrong.
What I am curious about though is they never specifically said that they were married. So if they are not in a legal marriage, then can the immigration department actually even gve them a change to verify and/or give the mother a green card to stay in America? Which state do they live in and does that state still have legalized gay marriages? Because if that is the case, they should have gotten married close to when they decided to have kids together and maybe the immigration department would have to give them a chance at staying together since, in the eyes of the law, they are in a legal binding marriage contract just like every other couple in this country. Those would be the only terms on which I think they could really bring this issue up as a violation of the law. But, since they are in a partnership, without legal papers verifying that this is the real deal, then the real issue at hand is the one that is actually presented – the lack of acceptance of the immigration department for same-sex relationships to apply for a visa/.green card (i am not quite sure on what grounds the mother was deported).
The immigration department should realize that the whole movement of this country is towards gay rights. There are changes that need to happen in people's attitudes towards the matter, but that change first has to come from the system. The laws and processes that holds this country together should make the effort to make the difference – make the change. I strongly believe that the laws for immigration should be extended to homosexual partnerships. They are given to gays regularly since many of the gay people do not notify the immigration department, so what is the difference for two gays. There should not be any. They are creating negative relationships within the country, turning a happy family into a broken home.
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This is the biggest problem I have with governments not recognizing gay marriages. Here you have a family that in every other way is identical to every other family in the world, but because the parents are the same sex, they can be torn apart at a moments notice. They love each other and their children just as much as a heterosexual couple, but since they have matching equipment it is not considered legal when it comes to issues such as immigration. Just like Prof. Richards, I believe this kind of hypocrisy is totally ridiculous. It should not even be an issue. Why makes one family a family and another not? Where does it say that parents have to be heterosexual to “count”?
Unfortunately deportation is only one of many problems that gay marriage families can face. Issues like inheritances, insurance policies, and things like hospital visitation rights can all be muddled if a couple is not officially “married” in the eyes of the church and state. They could have been living together for years, and as in this case even raised children together, and not be granted rights like those of heterosexual couples. It almost seems like an issue that we as a society should have sorted out by now, an outdated argument and way of thinking that America should have dealt with and now be thought of as archaic.
Listen, if the church doesn’t want to recognize gay marriages, that’s fine. Religion has the right to be exclusive and make their own rules depending on their beliefs. But government does not have that option. We separated church and state for that very reason, but apparently a lot of people didn’t get the memo. The government should recognize gay marriages so these kinds of problems do not happen anymore.
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This video was tough to watch on several levels. The first thing to come to my mind was how counter productive it would be to separate this family. Clearly both moms love each other in the same way that a husband and a wife does. But they cannot avoid immigration laws simply because marriages between two people of the same sex is not recognized by the American government. To imagine that thirty six thousand families are in the same predicament is mind-boggling. To know that half of those families have small children only makes things worse. It’s clear that the children in the case seen in the video are well cared for. Both vouch for keeping their family together. In a world where two parent families with well raised children are important, splitting this family apart would be a terrible idea. There are surely negative financial consequences for losing a parent, creating a money problem that never should have occurred. In addition, one parent being forced to spend time between kids and work is definitely not ideal. Two parents can better share this load. By sending one of the parents back to the Philippines, we risk destroying the stability of the family. Is it worth it? In my opinion its not a fair decision in any respect. Laws need to be created in order to recognize that a couple of the same sex has the same rights as a more traditional couple. These new laws need to expand beyond the problem shown in the video as well. For example, same sex couples don’t share the same hospital visitation rights that traditional couples enjoy. Traditional couples also get tax benefits that same sex couples often do not have. Perhaps the most damning thing is that same sex couples, even if they are stable and filled with love, are not recognized by the American government in the same way traditional couples are. Lots of work needs to be done in order to fix all these issues, but I am confident that new legislation will be passed at some point in the near future.
Whenever a video like this shows up, I always try to put myself in the person’s shoes being shown on the computer screen. If I had go to through a situation where my wife had to be deported despite having kids and being married to an American citizen, I would be extremely distraught. It should be no wonder why the family in this video is upset at the very idea of a deportation tearing their family apart. If we try to imagine ourselves in the shoes of others more often, I think we can view everyone on a more human level and strive to make each other happier, not torn.
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Obviously, this is quite troubling. I have always gotten into giant debates with people about this issue. In my mind, it all starts with morality: Is it morally right or wrong for LGBT people to be married? In my opinion, it is nobody's business what anyone wants to do. It's their own lives, so why is it right for a third party to decide what they can and cannot do? Since when can you differentiate love? Love is a natural feeling, and the fact that is can happen between a man and a woman or two members of the same sex shouldn't matter. Love is love, and from someone who has felt this all-powerful emotion, it's not gonna matter who you are in love with, you are gonna want to share your life with them. It's a personal connection that should never be disrupted. So because some guys wrote in a book a couple thousand years ago that basically God will smite you for being gay, then obviously it is true. False. I was born and raised a Catholic and the first thing I was taught was that the Catholic Church is open and understanding for anyone. It's a caring church. Little did I know once I got older I would be taught that homosexuals deserve to be killed and that it's a choice and only bad people make it. Let's just say I don't affiliate with the church anymore. Until this country is taken away from its traditional Evangelical, religious background, we won't see any change in the attitudes of people towards gay marriage. This video has taught me a lot. First, that people don't really have hearts. If they did, why would they do this then? Yeah, as an employee of the government, you have to do what you are told. But who are these people making these orders to deport people? Did they not realize they would ruin an entire family? Maybe if they took the time to look at their own family and put themselves in the position of these women. I truly believe that one day this will all change, once the older, less accepting generations die off and the youth takes over. Now maybe I’m wrong, but I feel that because of the environment we are raised in now, we are more aware of the negative effects that decisions being put in place have on people.
My bottom line is this: Look deep down into your hearts and ask yourselves why there is such a negative attitude towards gay marriage. Does it really have any effect on you or anyone surrounding you? Gay marriage affects only those involved. So I don’t think anyone else deserves an opinion, but since everyone makes them, keep the negative aspects to yourself. And remember, what if that happened to your family?
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This is exactly why we need to make gay marriage legal. It is outrageous that something like this can happen in this "free" nation. We are all taught that anything is possible in America, we can be who we want to be. As long as we aren't gay, that is. It's completely unfair that we are such a diverse country but we still can't accept this concept that two people can fall in love and they happen to be of the same sex. I understand that this case is probably extremely rare, but that doesn't change the fact that things like this shouldn't happen. Our country shouldn't be able to tell us who to love or marry. It's completely absurd that our government has the power to not let people get married and hasn't changed! They can make the decision to drop an atomic bomb but it's still up in the air whether two people in love should get married? How does that even make sense. We live in a world where anything is possible these days. Except gay marriage.
It may seem unnatural to have two dads or two moms, but not to the kids growing up in that family. Who are we to say that's wrong, that's their family. We have dogs and cats and treat them as family, yet we don't judge those people. We judge a family with two moms because it's not normal, but what's normal really? A lot of kids grow up with only one parent most of the time because of divorces, we don't judge them either. Families are all different these days. It doesn't matter what the average family is, it just matters that your family loves you.
People need to relax and stop resisting the change. It's going to happen eventually why delay it? I don't understand the protesters and antigays. They're people! Who cares what they do with their private life it doesn't concern you. Let people be who they want to be. There is always going to be tension about gay people but people just need to open their eyes and mind. I'm sure a lot of the gay haters know a gay person and might not even know it. For example, one of my friends is against gay marriage and is generally against gay people, but she watches Ellen all the time and loves her. How can you say that her being gay is wrong? It makes her who she is and why so many people love her. It seems a bit hypocritical to me.
In general, people need to relax, grow up and learn some tolerance.
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This video is very interesting. As an HDFS major I have heard in two of my classes (315 and 481) that the definition of a family is is changing. Normally when one thinks about a family unit they mention a father, mother, and children. But a family can consist of two men and a children or in this case two women and children. But we have been programed to think that a normal family is heterosexual. Images in the media, religious beliefs, culture, tradition have all influenced our views on different topics, especially when it comes to sexual preference.But American has to realize there are so many different kind of people here in the States and their views may not be the same as others.
I personally do not have a problem with same sex marriages of couples. We all have our own lives to live, why on earth would I worry about what the next person is doing? At the end of the day we all all human-beings. You wanna test it, cut yourself and a Lesbian/gay/transsexual/ person, see what the result would be. You two will both bleed blood. It does not matter if the other person doe not share the same views as you. People must learn how to focus on their own issues in life and stop pointing fingers at others. Hatred in this world is only due to different opinions. if we could only stop making hasty generalizations, limit criticism, and judging others the world would be much peaceful and enjoyable. What people fail to realize is that when you point your finger at another person, there are always three fingers pointing back at you.
In terms of this video, It is devastating that this family has to endure this act of discrimination. The woman should be legal in the United States being that her wife and children are citizens. Immigration, just like many other people within the United States do not recognize/ approve of same sex marriages. Even countries outside of the United States do not approval of same sex marriage. Punishment could range from serving jail time to being killed. I watched a youtube video once that showed a man being burned for stealing. the video was filmed in Nigeria , country in West Africa. If someone could get punished for a minor crime such as stealing for another person, imagine what they would do if someone was openly gay within the community. He would be tormented.
This woman's case is serious, at anytime she can be deported leaving behind her family, close friends and career. The family is seen in the footage as normal and on a regular bases they would describe their family life as normal. the children seem well adjusted and comfortable. if would be sad if immigration come along and take one of their caregiver away. This can have a huge affect on their emotional states. it would be the same way if a father decides to divorce his wife, leaving his kids behind. The will experience overwhelming feelings of depression, and shame/guilt. No family or child deserves to experience something like that.
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After having watched the story of this family, and having the class with Sam Richards, I now realize that I know very little about the problems that the people in the LGBT community face on a daily basis. I always thought that the worst thing that happened to them was that they were discriminated against. I did not know that they had less rights. Honestly, this just shocks me. As I see it, we are all just people, and we should all be entitled to the same rights. Just as white and black people now (for the most part) have equal rights, because they are all simply people, I believe that straight and LGBT people should all have the same rights too, as they too are all simply PEOPLE like the rest of us. I truly am shocked by the fact that there ever was any rule against it at all.
I feel so strongly for the family whose lives were shown on this video, and as the child said at the end of it, his mother did not deserve that kind of treatment. I have a friend whose parents are lesbian, and I know that they are all amazing human beings. I cannot imagine them being treated the same way that that woman in the video was treated. Nobody should ever have to face that kind of treatment, especially for something that they cannot control. I truly believe that it is not a choice that people make, to be gay. Why would they purposely choose to lead a harder life? It is something they are born with, something that they cannot change, so how can they possibly be punished for it?
I almost feel like the government is making these rules to ensure that the LGBT community does not exist in the future. By giving them less rights and allowing them to be discriminated against freely, it is like saying it is okay to make them feel unwanted and uncomfortable. After being treated that way I do not see why anyone would ever come out. So eventually, even if they were experiencing feelings that showed that they were not straight, they would not let anybody know, and basically live a lie all their lives.
If the rest of us are free to love whoever we want to, why shouldn't they be? If things were the other way around and all straight people were forced to be gay, speaking for myself and I am sure many other straight people as well, I would be extremely uncomfortable with that. The same way that I would assume the LGBT people feel about society forcing them to be straight. It is simply unfair.
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After watching this video and seeing the people it affects and the pain it causes, I don’t understand how anyone can still be against gay marriage, even if it does conflict with your own beliefs. The issue of families getting torn apart because of immigration laws is just one of the many examples of rights that gay couples lack.
As you could see from the piece, there is nothing especially unique about this family and they seem to generally follow the norms of our society, so why should they be put at a disadvantage because of the parents’ sexual orientation?
I think civil unions are great, as they serve a step in the right direction, but people who support these and not marriage don’t understand they are not equal in the eyes of the law. For the states that have civil unions, those rights don’t extend beyond its borders. That means if they move to a state that does not accept them, the couples rights will not be recognized there. However, if you’re married you’re rights will be accepted in all states.
Since civil unions go by the state laws, they are also not accepted by the federal government, so gay couples lack equality when filing their taxes as well. And obviously marriage supplies many medical and health benefits that are lacking in civil unions. For instance, a person in a civil union can’t cover their “spouse” with their health insurance if need be.
The one argument that always pops up is that marriage is a religious institution. This may have been true at one time, and I know it still holds true for many people today. However, in the eyes of the government, it is not just about religion, but about a legal contract that binds you. You get marriage license issued by the state, not your church! Divorce isn’t necessarily condoned by the church, but still anyone is allowed the right to do so without worrying about what religion has to say about it. Again, I do understand that for many people it’s still about a commitment to God and not the government, but just remember that a lot of other rights come along with it. Supplying rights to one group of people and denying it to another is inequality and there is no other way to put that.
It amazing to see how that acceptance of LGBT has grown in our society, that’s why I find it so hard to believe how far they are from full equality. Only a handful of states offer civil unions to same-sex couples and even less grant marriage licenses. Even when one state actually does take a step forward, it can easily detract the progress, like with the instance of California and Prop 8.
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Gay marriage is a very touchy subject. It has become a huge topic of discussion in the past ten years and continues to grow. I am on the fence when it comes to homosexuality. The religious side of me dose not agree with it. The carefree college side of me believes people should be able to do whatever they want.
Since I am Catholic it has always been considered a sin and highly immoral to me. Most major religions in this country have the same beliefs. It would be offensive take away the religious freedom of the majority to have to recognize a relationship they consider sinful. I am not a hardcore religious person but I still hold strong beliefs on this matter.
Our society has been built on strong family values. It has helped our country get through many challenges over the centuries. The reason our culture and values have gone down the tubes is the weakening of families. By adding this type of “family” it would only do more harm then good.
If the United States did legalize gay marriage it would open the floodgates in the legality of marriage. What if someone wants to marry their brother or parent? What if someone wants to marry his or her pet? What if someone wants to have multiple wives or husbands? This country needs a permanent definition of what marriage really is. These options might sound absurd but all it takes is a few activists to open the door.
You also have to think about the kids these couples will have. They will be brought up with either no father or mother figure. It doesn’t take a child psychologist to know their development will be hurt. The video shows how it can affect kids.
The woman in the video should have been deported. She’s an illegal alien who doesn’t belong in this country. It’s harsh but its true. Now she is trying to marry her way into citizenship with another woman. She’s hurting the family and the kids who don’t deserve it. If the United States legalized gay marriage she would become a citizen, but is that right?
I am not against homosexuality at all. I am mostly against gay marriage since it causes many problems. If two gay people want to be with each other they should but without the act of marriage. If you love someone that much you shouldn’t need to get married to prove it. You can live the rest of your life together as a gay couple. I don’t have much experience with gay people or how they feel on the matter. I’m not saying it will be the end of the world if it is legalized but it will definitely create a huge divide in the country.
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AJYukevich Reply:
February 19th, 2010 at 9:01 pm
I have some points and questions for you, jpm5107. Please get back to me. I am interested in your argument, and would really appreciate it if you would engage me in a conversation.
You wrote in your response that “Most major religions in this country have the same beliefs.” You seemed to indicate that this was part of your reasoning as to why recognizing GLBT relationships is wrong. Aside from the GLBT argument, did you think about people who do not make up the religious majority in America? Just because the majority can in fact hold a majority on a belief does not necessarily make them correct or right.
You also mentioned that strong family values have “helped our country get through many challenges over the years.” Would you mind giving me some examples? Because I can’t really think of anything. I want to understand your argument, and to do that, I and the other blog readers need those holes filled in.
In the same paragraph about “strong family values”, you indicated that American culture and values have gone awry due to the traditional family arrangement breaking down. Is it breaking down because of different family arrangements? I don’t think so. I think it’s breaking down because some people who should not have been married or have children actually did, and then got divorced. That literally breaks a family down. If a family is comprised of a loving adult and their child, two loving adults and no children, or anything possible, is that a terrible familial arrangement? Or does one parent have to have a vagina and one have to have a penis? Sex organs make all the difference in how we raise children, don’t they? I’m assuming that the parents would have to be naturally male and female, right?
Sex organs do not make you a suitable mother or father. They just make you able to BE a mother or father. I will never understand why one parent must be a woman, and one a man. I also will never understand why there needs to be two parents for a “traditional” and “suitable” family. My father died when I was 6, and I didn’t have a step-father for years after that. My mother made us the best family that I could have ever had when my dad died – she did her best, and we still felt loved and held together. I would assume that a lesbian would do the same if she were single for her children. It is what a responsible parent does, regardless of sexual orientation.
The point that I just made relates to one that you made in your blog entry. You stated “They [the children] will be brought up with either no father or mother figure. It doesn’t take a child psychologist to know their development will be hurt.” I believe that we went over a slide in class (slide number 38 in the slideshow titled “LGBTand Ethnocentrism”) that states that The American Academy of Pediatrics supports LGBT adoptions. I guess you (an probably a lot of other people) weren’t listening for that slide.
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gcj Reply:
February 20th, 2010 at 4:18 am
Religion is a topic we all struggle with, the reason is because it helps define who we are. I will address the article later on in this post but I want to first address your feelings. I will not say that you should not question your religion that is something even the most religious people have done. Questioning aspects of your religion helps you to realize more about yourself and your religion. Another good reason for questioning some stories or even beliefs is because it prepares you for situation like this, when others question your religion.
Sam speaks about how the bible was written by humans and was inspired by God, this is definitely true. Later he compares the authors of the bible with him and how someone inspires him. What he fails to comprehend is that God is not another human who is inspiring the authors, he is the Supreme Being. Of course non-believers will say that this is the typical answer they expect from a Christian, to refer to God as the Supreme power who is strictly righteous. I believe that the authors do add their own twist and most certainly include their own bias into the bible.
The article initially caught my attention. I was not totally convinced that their fact about Eve being made from the bone of a penis was true but at least I thought it was a plausible belief. As I kept reading the story it lost credibility with me. I wonder if the author of the article or even Sam, for that matter, could give a logical answer as to how that would change the true meaning of the scriptures. Say if she
(Eve) was derived from a bone in Adam’s penis, does that changed the fact that both were creations from God. Does this change the fact that Eve was made from a part of Adam’s anatomy and they indeed sinned and was kicked out of the garden of Egypt?
As a Christian scholar, I have studied the bible and have questioned some things about the bible. One fact I found was that some men were accredited with accomplishments in the bible that were actually done by women. Again this does not change the fact that God allowed someone to make these accomplishments. The main facts about the Bible are not ambiguous: the fact that we were created by God, the crucifixion, resurrection and ascension of Jesus, the gift of the Holy Spirit, and the promise that Jesus will return. I believe there are two different types f Christians. There are those who do not allow others to question their beliefs in fear that they will not be able to answer and then there are Christians like me. I am a realist, we are humans and with that we fall short of the glory of God: both Christians and non Christians
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This is a very sad and moving story, its unbelievable that such outdated, hypocritical laws are still in operation. The US government has constantly stressed the importance of two parent households, with a divorce rate hovering around 50%. Yet, depite this they continue to tear apart happy families, as a result of the an unjust discriminative refusal to recognise same sex marriage, hence immigrants are deported despite unions with same sex US citizens.
I can kind of understand the stance of religion refusing to recognise same-sex marriage, even though I wholeheartedly disagree with the Church's position, it is their right to use their beliefs to guide their rules and regulations. However, the government, a government of a country supposedly based on freedom and equality, does not have this right. There is absolutely nothing different from this family in the video, and many millons of other happy families with opposite sex parents. They do not love the children any less, yet simply because they share the same sex, these families don't have the same basic rights as a 'traditional' American family. Even if these relationships are not recognised by the church as official marriages, the government must adjust legislation to guarantee such families the same basic rights as opposite sex marriages.
It is outragous to think that 36000 families are facing this same predicament. I cannot believe with all the issues faced by the government in this current climate, financial and human resources are being allocated to help facilitate the break up of harmless, happy same-sex families. It is impossible to watch this video, and to remain in support of such narrow minded, backwards legislation. There are millions of illegal immigrants living in the US, and many thousands of these are involved in criminal activities, with this in mind it seems barbaric that resources that could be used to catch the law breaking illegal immigrants, instead it is used to deport immigrants that in a fair and equal legal system would not even be classified as illegal immigrants, who are law abiding individuals involved in the raising of children.
I believe that gay people are in no way different to straight people, they were simply born or developed a different sexual orientation. Therefore to be granted different rights to straight people in respect to marriage and immigration laws is utterly shameful. If legal protection in this case is based on being involved in a union of marriage, and marriage as a gay couple isn't recognised, then we clearly have a highly hipocritical situation, where the simple solution is for legal recognition of a union between a same sex couple having the same legal standing as a heterosexual marriage. Gay people deserve to be treated in the exact same way as straight people, most especially by the legal system.
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I was appalled by this video. Here is a stable, normal family. The parents are in love and faithful and good to each other. They have a nice house and two beautiful children whom they love and care for. Yet because they are lesbians the marriage is not sufficient enough to be deemed “normal?” Same sex partners are not recognized? It almost sounds like a joke to me. America needs more families like this. Children need more parents like this. That immigration law sickens me. The discrimination against same-sex couples sickens me. I feel that love is love no matter whom it is and I don’t see why people care so much. How are these people hurting you? If anything they are making marriage more real. They’re making marriage more real because they are actually marrying for LOVE. This woman in the video married her partner because she loved her. Not for money, not for citizenship, strictly based on the fact that they were in love and wanted to spend the rest of their lives together. I don’t even know many people who share those same values. My parents are divorced, my grandparents are divorced, and most of my friends have divorced parents as well. But that’s all fine and dandy because those were not same sex marriages. My parents basically got married because my mom had gotten pregnant. They thought that they were in love at the time, but it obviously didn’t work out. These people in this video knew that they were meant to be together forever, and that is what a real marriage is. It doesn’t matter if they’re both women because they married for the right reasons. They married for the reasons that are in the Bible. If same sex marriages are not going to be supported in this country, then at least a stable family structure and a true marriage should be supported. It’s very unfortunate that our world has to be this way. That even in other countries people can get in trouble for loving someone of the same sex. Everyone on here is right. America is supposed to stand for freedom. That should also mean freedom to love whoever you want to love and be whoever you want to be. I wish that all the discrimination would stop but that is very unlikely. I feel for this family so much. It would be horrible to have my family ripped apart just because of the choices I make and who I choose to love. I could not even imagine what that would be like. I think that this family sets an example for what other families should be like. A family who has a stable happy relationship and takes care of their children.
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I don’t think that it is right that they can separate families just because they are gay or lesbian trying to have a family. I don’t think that they should try to separate it they are just normal families trying to live like people that are heterosexual in marriages. I don’t think that it is right they could just separate a family like that they are discriminating because you’re not living by what the majority is doing and a lot of people don’t like same sex marriage but you should not be discriminated for what you are and neither because you choose to have kids they should not be able to take your kids away from you that is just wrong. They should allow it to happen if that’s what you want in life I think you should be able to choose to live whatever way you want and it’s not just same sex marriages, people who are polygamists with children also have difficult times.
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For children I think this is something very hard to deal with having parents of same sex or in a polygamist’s family. In school they may not get fully accepted because of being different t when they really are not different at all but people just see it outside the norm and that’s what the problem is. Why is it that we are expected to have a heterosexual marriage to be normal. I think that it is also wrong that they separated families because doesn’t that violate our rights, and also since they are immigrants that is something that affects this if they were a white same sex couple maybe they would not try to separate them as much although they still do.
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I don’t think regardless of your race, sexual preference ,or whatever u choose to be you should not be treated unequal and that’s where the problem falls with equality and whatever you choose to be should be ok with everyone and if its not then people need to think about things and know they are not perfect. We are only human and no one is perfect people may think they are but they should check again. I think this is definitely something we need to work on and start accepting people for what they are not what you want them to be. For the families being separated just because of being the way they are I think they should fight for staying together and I think that we all could look at this as an opportunity to a change in the world and we would all be happy and nobody would feel unequal. We can all work together to be united and that’s what I would say we need.
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Up until I came to college, I hadn’t really encountered many gay and lesbian people in my life. I went to Catholic high school and I am sure that there were gay people there, but they probably did not come out until after high school was over. Even though I grew up in a town where LGBT issues were simply not talked about, my parents have always told me to accept and be kind to everyone, no matter how different they are than me. I have never had a problem with couples of the same sex. I think people should be able to love whomever they choose.
This video made me really think about the problem we have in the United States about same sex marriages. I just do not understand it because America is supposed to be a land of freedom and equality, however by no means are couples of the same sex being treated equally. I saw that someone else brought this up to, about America supporting families and the role that families play in our lives. I do not believe that a child raised by parents of the same sex would grow up any differently than a child raised my parents of different sexes.
I feel bad that people of the same sex are not allowed to get married in most states. I am sure it would be extremely hard if someone told me that I could not be married to the person I truly love. This video is heartbreaking because you can tell how much these two people love each other and how much their children love them but people are forcing and tearing their family apart.
America can not say that it stands for freedom when there is so much hate and discrimination against not only LGBT peoples but also, as the video brings up, immigrants. I could not believe the video when it said that 36,000 other families are going through the same thing. I really believe that these people should be able to live in the United States as family, a supposed “equal” country.
I understand that some people are against gay marriage because of religious reasons. But I believe that God loves all people and wants us all to be happy. Most religions teach about how we are supposed to kind of others and help our fellow man, but how are taking away people’s rights and telling someone who they can and can not love showing kindness?
This video, along with Sam’s talk on Tuesday, has really opened my eyes to all of these issues being presented. I guess because most of my friends feel the same way that I do about gay marriage, I never really paid attention to how much discrimination LGBT people have to face. It is most definitely unfair and I hope that laws are passed soon to allow people to be married to whomever they choose.
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It saddens me that this is going on in our country. No one deserves to have their family torn apart for being different from the norm. Reading some of these other responses have brought things to my attention. One student commented saying that being related by blood or marriage is the only way to be considered a family. I strongly disagree with this. The people in this video are just as much of a family as any other in the United States. Just because they are not married does not mean that there is not love and compassion. This couple clearly has love for one another and love and compassion are what family is all about, not something silly like marriage. Another thing that I read and that I agreed with was that homosexual couples actually want their children. Homosexual couples cannot produce a child on their own so they need to look for another way with the help of someone or something. If they are willing to go through a process to have a child, it is clear that a child is something they really want and want to love. There are many heterosexual couples in the world that do not care about their children, had children on accident, or just do not want their children. I believe that if two people are capable of loving a child and wanting to have a child in their life, then they should be allowed to do so regardless of their sexual orientation. The immigration laws in this country are just a bit ridiculous to me. I never knew about this issue until I watched this video. I can’t believe that the government would tear this family a part just because of the woman’s sexual orientation. What has she done wrong in any way? She loves another woman, she did not kill any one or rob a bank. This family does not deserve what they have to go through. I understand that some people are against gay marriage because of their religion and being raised Catholic , I know many people who feel strongly about this subject. But I think that people need to look past their beliefs because if it does not directly affect their lives, then what is the big deal about? It makes me sad to think about how gay and lesbian people are treated and perceived as. They are the same as everyone else, they have feelings, they just happen to like people of the same gender. What is the crime there? I have a gay aunt who took forever to come out because she was scared to see what family and friends would say. This should not have to be this way. I hope that some day soon there will be legalization of gay marriage and that immigration laws about marriage will change.
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This video did not completely surprise me. The thing is in many countries gay and lesbian relationships is considered completely wrong because most of the population especially South American countries are very religious. There are members of my family that I could not even reveal that I had sex before marriage because they are so traditional. There are religions strictly against use of birth control at the same time. Its ridiculous many of the things people abide by whilst practicing their religion. If a less restrictive culture wise country like the United States does not allow gay /lesbian marriage in several states, its going to be less recognized by immigration.
I fully support homosexual couples being able to raise a family and be recognized by state atleast as a married couple. I believe many gay couples in fact make better parents than many heterosexual people, because if you think about it when a gay couple has children it is because they want to take on that responsibility and care for another life. Whereas many people are throwing the children they nurtured in their bodies into foster care, adoption, dumpsters, completely ignoring the child. I mean if you have to you have to but in the end of the day why does such a person get to have all their rights and stay in the US while a parent to two beautiful sons gets deported out of the country just for being a homosexual.
. I admit I get weirded out when I go to very openly gay communities like Boston and there are gay couples all over the place walking hand in hand displaying intense PDA, but thats just because after I'm not used to seeing that since its so rejected by the population.
One other thing though just to throw out there my views on lesbian and gay couples. I fully support lesbian and gay couples, however I don’t like those gay men who are so scared to come out of the closet that they go on to have families and be in a heterosexual marriage, and then break the family into pieces when they decide to come out of the closet randomly. One thing that turned me off from fully accepting gay people is a couple of speakers that came into my highschool to talk about how they are gay. Instead I found myself less accepting of gay men because these men selfishly tore their families apart just because they wanted to hide from their homosexuality and force others into their deniles. Eventually I was able to realize that it wasn’t that they were homosexual it was that they were cowards. I just believe people should go ahead and fully embrace who they are at a young age. Im still young and learn new things everyday, but I recognize who I am no matter how outside the box I may be. I am heterosexual, but either way I do not think I am any better than the person next to me to deny them the same rights and opportunities I have. Many people in this country forget that. Its not just about being an exclusive member of the America its also about being a member of the human race. We should all embrace the diversity and large knowledge that every human being carries. Talk to those people you think are strange or not typically part of your group you may find out something interesting.
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Growing up in the United States, I am still deeply confused on what America stands for? This whole gay marriage concept dwells upon, what I am about to talk about. From my understanding, The United States of America, when it was first becoming inhabited, took the stance, that it would be free to any religion or practice. Another way to put it is that people would go to America to achieve the American dream, practice or achieve what ever they wanted to do without being punished for their actions. This is my opinion, but it seems, The United States started to concentrate on one religion. Why does the National Anthem of the United States incorporate the word God. It seems now they have gone from accepting anything to only putting one religion into the National Anthem. Gays or lesbians have been discriminated, for who knows how long. I believe one of the reasons for this is, in almost every religion or practice, they disregard anyone being gay. It is for this, that it is such a controversial subject, of why they can not be married. The religions that do practice marriage, say its sacred and it can only be between a women and a man. This whole ordeal goes to show, of how much of an influence the Church is on the government. As long as I know the government has been creating laws in the favor of the majority. Forty years ago the drinking used to be 18, and today the drinking age was raised to 21. I know for a fact if it wasn't for MADD, Mothers against Drunk Driving, I believe that the drinking age would still be 18. This is another reason why I think that gay marriage is looked down upon, is because so many people devoted themselves to their religions that they believe what they learn and do not accept what anyone else says. Since there are so many religions out their that discriminate against gay marriage, it has been a big a problem for the government to pass a law to accept gay marriage. There is only two states in The United States that have laws accepting gay marriage, the rest had these same laws, but stripped them away. I am not perfect, but the government needs to find a better medium. What i mean by this is that, for every law they create people are going to like it and people are going to hate it. I think they need a better criteria standard for passing laws. If you look at other countries around the world, there are very view laws and their common sense, things like I shall not steal nor shall I murder anyone. In the United States, there are so many laws out there maybe in the thousands that I never knew. How does the government expect us to follow the laws, when we ourselves do not know. To make a conclusion, The United States needs to go back to its roots, when they accepted anyone or anything. Gay marriage should be allowed in the United States, who does it hurt, who is it really stealing from? The government and religion need to stop being selfish and need to keep to themselves. Religions also need to stop trying to make everyone like them.
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Honestly, I am tired of this whole gay marriage debate. Before someone labels themselves as "Gay", realize that they are human beings and human beings have rights. In the Constitution, it says that we are entitled to "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness", well isn't finding love leading to ones pursuit of happiness? As a Christian, I honestly do not see anything wrong with it, because if you want to judge someone because of sins that they have committed, then EVERYONE would be at the midst of Jesus Christ. Whether you lie, cheat, steal, commit adultery…a sin is a sin. Also, they took their mom away as if they were living in harsh conditions that enabled them to be in foster care. The children were happy, there were no psychological effects that the kids faced. Taking their mom away from them would make things WORST, does it not? What’s crazy about this story is that they would attempt to deport the mother from a two-parent family. The United States is trying so hard over the past few years to encourage two-parent families and spending millions of dollars on research that finds the benefits of having two parents in a family that are raising children in correlation with single parent households. However they’re still eagerly trying to deport her. Also, you can tell that the incident where the boys’ mother was getting arrested really upset her sons greatly. It’s ridiculous that the United States would rather deport this non-citizen mother than recognize a same-sex union, which would allow her to continue to live with her family and continue promoting such a healthy environment with two-parents. I am shocked and appalled at this. My views are like this because two of my family members are gay, none of us judge them. However when we are out, they get looks as if they are aliens or something…especially when my aunt goes to use the restroom. Honestly, the US needs to stop paying attention to this and focus on more pertinent things. Family is the one most important aspect of our society, and I feel that it is wrong to tear it apart.
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This video just proves further more how people trying to dictate another person's right to marry someone of the same sex, affects more than just the fact these two people are in love and want to make it official. This affects the entire family, it affects taxes and how much money can be earned back, it affects so many different things in so many different ways and puts same sex couples at an even biggest disadvantage in society than simply, not being able to get married. I think it's ridiculous that this lady is obviously a mother, and has a life partner, but was taken out of her home and put in handcuffs only because her union isn't on paper, BECAUSE IT CAN'T BE A MARRIAGE–because the government won't allow same sex marriage. Ridiculous.
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This is a very sad situation and the fact that this is happening to so many people is even worse. There are many reasons why same sex couples should have all the same rights as straight couples. It is ridiculous that there is even a debate over this issue. First of all if church and state are supposed to be separated than why does the bible have anything to do with the situation. People should be allowed to marry whoever they want. The government should not be able to tell two people that they cannot be married or that their marriage is not legitimate. That is basically telling people that their love is not legitimate. I do not understand why other people concern themselves with this issue. It only concerns the lives of the couples that want to be married and they are obviously not hurting anything or anyone by getting married. If two people are in love and want to start a family, than who cares if they are the same sex. The fact that these laws exist is clearly hurting so many couples that simply want to get married. The fact that these people cannot get married causes situations such as the one seen in the video and generally just prevents something that should be a given right for everyone, regardless of if they are gay or not. There many circumstances where these couples have been together for 10 or more years and cannot get married because people in the government are against it. I do not really understand why they are against it and I think using the bible as an excuse is a cop out. They do not want these people to get married just because they are homophobic. This is complete discrimination of a group of people. It would be comparable to the government ruling that black people could not get married, which is completely ridiculous. For whatever reason that is what is happening to gay people and it has to be changed. The fact that families are being separated purely because they are not allowed to get married should never be allowed. They need to change these rules so gay couples have all the same rights as straight couples which would prevent all of these terrible situations from happening. I think that anyone that does not see how close minded it is to disapprove of gay couples getting married really needs to take a second to really think about how stupid it is. Gay couples getting married does not negatively effect anyone is any way, shape or form. I sincerely hope that the government can pass legislation that gay couples can get a legitimate marriage anywhere in the United States so that all of these people can get married and live in peace.
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I think Sam raises an extremely important issue, which is definitely best illustrated through a video. When people see this families’ hardships first-hand, the message is much more powerful. I also think that because the class has been exposed to racial, immigration, and LGBT issues they are much more understanding than your average American would be.
My point, in highlighting that the class is more open to these issues, is the importance of hearing people’s stories. I think the reason most Americans are ignorant and closed to issues with LGBT families dealing with immigration problems is because they haven’t been exposed to these stories or haven’t been close to someone dealing with these problems.
Mainly through false stories and even fear of the unknown, many Americans would be quick to be closed to these issues. These people probably heard a story about a bad person, who was the exception to the larger group, and that story is what they base their entire image of the larger community on. Adding LGBT and immigration in the same dilemma is a double problem that most people are not willing to hear.
Especially because LGBT and immigration are too hot issues in U.S. politics it’s even more difficult to include the two.
To go further, if someone is closed to LGBT concerns they certainly aren’t going to consider immigration for that group, and the same for those not excepting of immigration issues, certainly aren’t going to expand and be open to gay rights in immigration petitions.
But overall, the issue isn’t that LGBT couples should be able to petition for their foreign partners, but that as a society we need to be more open to one another. I do not even need to take the time to think about whether gay and lesbian couples should have the ability to petition immigration concerns for their partners. The answer is simple, yes, of course. How would it be fair for heterosexual couples to have this right and not same-sex couples?
When people become accepting of all people, these questions become simple. So the problem here, is not immigration or gay and lesbian couples rights, but as a society becoming more accepting of our differences. We should not be judging one another based on what sex they are attracted to, but on our actions and regards for humanity.
This may seem overly idealistic, but I think the major problem is fighting over this singles issues, when the problem is in fact a large one that we fail to address. Sure, to ever accept the LGBT community, we need to learn about this lifestyle, to understand, they’re so similar to opposite-sex couples. But sticking to singles issues can be very harmful, so instead I challenge you to look to the broader problems and judge people on things that matter like a person’s character.
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Being raised Catholic, I was always taught that homosexuality was taboo and wrong and anyone who was homosexual was a bad person and was going to burn in hell. I was also taught that homosexuals were usually weird people and freaks and that they were trying to spread their gayness onto everyone around them. First off, that is completely ridiculous to think that gays are these people who go around like recruiters, trying to bring more people into their "gay circle". Obviously, as I grew out of my immaturity and "child religion", I realized that this whole argument did not make sense and was completely outrageous. Continually, I supported gay rights and the whole issue never seemed a big deal to me. I can understand that the Church does not want to marry homosexuals, but I believe that they should have the same legal benefits as a heterosexual married couple.
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jor5107 Reply:
February 20th, 2010 at 1:43 am
Completely agree! I was also raised catholic and knew that homosexuals were viewed as being wrong and would in fact burn in hell. My parents however never instilled that in me and made sure that I would learn to treat everyone the same regardless of their skin color or their sexuality. I feel that if they don’t bother you why are you bothering them? Why make their lives miserable when they have no effect on you. Gay people can be one of the most understanding people who do not judge and are human beings just like you and me. They also tend to be really funny too!
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As it turned out, a number of years ago while I was still in high school, I found out my uncle was homosexual. I have a gay uncle and he has a partner and they have been committed to each other for many years now. This issue seems to resonate more with me now because knowing someone who is close to you that is homosexual is an eye-opener for me. I've realized that clearly homosexuals are not necessarily bad people or evil people, but they are average normal people just trying to find their way in the world just like the rest of us. They lead normal, boring lives, and love their partner as much as a heterosexual couple would love each other. If the United States government does not see that gay couples are as legitimate as straight couples, then that really is a shame. I would rather have a gay couple get married and lovingly raise children, then have a straight couple get married just because they accidentally are having a child. Plus, when 50% of the marriages in this country between men and women end in divorce, who is to say that gay couples don't love each other the same, if not more, than a straight couple.
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Gay rights should not even be an issue anymore according to anyone in the United States. I feel that people who discriminate the LGBT community are those who actually do not know any LGBT people at all. They have outrageous beliefs that are not even necessarily based on facts. If they would meet a homosexual person, they would realize that they have the same wants and desires that we straight people do. They yearn for the same things in life as we do: success, companionship, love, etc. Just because they are gay does not mean that they are any less of a person than straight people are. Gay marriage should be legal, and in that marriage the couple should receive the same benefits as the heterosexual couple would.
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jor5107 Reply:
February 20th, 2010 at 1:40 am
Exactly! I mean who really cares?! Let them be! I think that if those who were the homophobes would actually take the time to get to know someone who is gay they would realize that they are the same as them. The only difference is their sexuality and if anything, they probably care more about having a family together because it takes so much for them to even qualify to have a family. Clearly the children are being taken care of so why are people making such a big deal out of it? Yeah I have no idea why its such a big deal other than the fact that people are so homophobic.
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It is a shame that same sex couples like this one have to face the fear of deportation. I never thought about this problem honestly, it is a fear that same sex couples have to face. Same sex marriage should be legal. Even though marriage is a "religious right", are we going to tell the atheist that they cannot call their marriage a marriage because they don't believe in God. If society wants to play the religious card it should not be biased to only gay people. If two people who are same sex and are in love and of the age of consent they should allowed to be married and have all the rights that straight people have. I don't understand why it is such a big deal honestly. Just legalize gay.
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