In Her Own Words

posted by Sam Richards

Coincidentally, Laurie was in a play tonight where SHE talked about bleeding. By the way, that’s her word, not mine.

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162 Responses to In Her Own Words

  1. nks5065 says:

    We must be comfortable about our body and we must know how our organs work. Although some girls might feel like it is embarrassing, it is actually very normal. yes, guys do get disgusted by it and it is best that girls dont talk about their PERSONAL period, but the fact that we understand how the period works and why exactly girls have it is important for a person to know, especially the women themselves.
    In our discussion group we talked about the topic for quite a long time and I feel like people are looking into this a bit too much, or at least our group was. I definitely have a lot of respect for women and understand that their period is a HUGE part of their life, however the fact that guys or even women do not want to talk about it does not necessarily mean they do not respect women or that society has taught us that it is a bad thing. A period to some women can be very personal and this can be for many different reasons. When i as a guy talk about the period i try to get off the topic pretty fast. This is not because I don't care about women or because I dont respect what they go through but for the simple reason of me not wanting to talk blood flowing out of parts of the body especially when many men look at that part of the body as a sexual place and dont want to think about it leaking blood.
    I think that a topic like this does not need so many questions because it is fairly simple. People should have a right to be able to feel how they want about a topic which honestly is not a big issue. When sam brought this up in class i dont agree with people getting upset and walking out because it is not offensive and everybody has heard talked about it before in some form or another. Understanding and respecting the topic is one issue but having to engage in the topic is another.
    Personally, when my girlfriend tells me she is PMS-ing ,I can't really tell her that i know how she feels because i dont know how she feels emotionally or physically. I do however, understand what she is going through and that is what is important.

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  2. jtomvp says:

    I don’t completely understand to what extent women go through every cycle that they have their period, so I obviously can’t relate to any sort of feelings they have about it to be honest. I get that some women want to “compete” with men but have many things that get in the way such as having a period to deal with. I didn’t fully understand how or why women would schedule a big part of their lives around that monthly cycle. I guess I take the stress-free life of being a guy for granted now that I think about menstruation.

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  3. nicks5069 says:

    I have never really thought about bleeding outside of the high school health classes we were required to take, so I guess that I am a example of what Sam was talking about in terms of the majority, in this case men, not thinking about the types of struggles that people that aren’t in the majority face, whether it be due to race, religion, sex, or sexuality. I don’t understand why this topic seems to be off limits or “just not something we talk about.” Like when Sam first brought it up in class most people seemed to gasp in shock or even chuckle, I didn’t really understand what happened that was funny or shocking, I admit I never really talked about it before but I also don’t avoid the subject. I guess that’s just because nobody seems to talk about it and being a guy, I never had to deal with it at all. I was even more confused when a few people even seemed mad that he even brought it up. Outside of health class I only remember it really coming up in serious conversation one other time. Once I reached the age where you get “the talk” about sex from your parents, I remember my mom talking very generically about what would start happening to girls about once a month. She explained about bleeding, or whatever she called it, and how a girl may seem like she suddenly doesn’t feel very well. She said that it was a natural process and that if I noticed anything like that not to make a scene out of it or anything. I still didn’t quite understand what she was talking about but because she seemed a bit evasive about it, I didn’t push the subject. So I guess that’s when I started to learn that it was a taboo subject. I assume that other’s are introduced to this in the same way and that is why it seems like everyone has seems awkwardness about it. But that still doesn’t really answer why, or when we decided that something that naturally happens to women every month is something we should not talk about. Take it for what it’s worth but those are just the thoughts and experiences of someone from majority.

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  4. psugal14 says:

    This whole bleeding monologue was ironically hilarious for me. I was one of those girls in class who was a little uncomfortable talking about this whole period thing. However, when I watched this video, it made me start to think. When did getting periods become normal for women? Why is it just a part out worlds like thinking and breathing. I get that it is something we cannot control, but if you think about it, the whole process is kind of astounding! If anything, you would think that girls would go around using it as an excuse for things. Which reminds me that my grandmother told me that she was not able to go to school when she had her period! … wish we still did that… ha.

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  5. klpeace1 says:

    My roommate has been working on this play all semester and I was really excited to watch this clip from it. I think that the issue of "that time of the month" is interesting to discuss this way since it is something never really discussed in public. I have mixed feelings on the issue as a whole. I have always found it rather strange that the issue is so taboo. Periods happen to every woman, every single month for the vast majority of our lives. I don't like that I feel the need to hide this aspect of my life as much as I currently do. It happens and men need to realize that and not be so intimidated by it. I agreed in class with the majority of what Sam said, though it was a bit awkward to here it from a man. I had literally never heard a man talk about a woman's period before. I appreciated that Sam would approach this issue at all, but I also understand why men feel uncomfortable around women talking about this time of the month. This is something that men literally can never have any understanding of. They can understand in theory what happens, but without having ever experienced it, I cannot understand how women bleeding and talking about it makes men uncomfortable.
    Personally, I think there needs to be some kind of balance between guys being allowed to feel uncomfortable and at the same time understanding that this monthly cycle is part of our lives and is not going away. I really do think that is ok for guys to feel uncomfortable about it. I just don’t want them to get offended when we talk about it or complain about cramps or something. It needs to be a more touchable subject in society as a whole. Guys should not get mad when we don’t feel like going out because we are hurting and we should be able to say the reason why we don’t feel well to our employers or just to society in general.
    Like I said, I really appreciated that Sam was able to bring this issue up in class. It is not something, I know, that is easy for men to talk about and it is an issue that needs to be less taboo in society. I was awkward as everyone else in that class, but I honestly think that it was mainly because it is something that people just don’t talk about in today’s society. My period is something that I personally don’t often talk about and don’t really feel needs a lot of attention, but I do agree that it would be nice if I did not have to feel embarrassed about being a woman. This is something that every woman has to deal with for almost her whole life and men really need to realize this and start being more accepting.

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  6. alm5467 says:

    I feel that this is an accurate thing that Laurie is saying and I have never taken the time to really think about why women are so secretive about getting a period, or as Sam and Laurie may call it, bleeding. Although I really have no desire to make my monthly bleed a public affair I do think it is interesting that no one ever talks about it and that is is seen by men as unnatural or disturbing. The fact is that it is totally natural and not THAT disturbing. I feel that it may have a negative connotation because it is not just bleeding but bleeding from a woman's genitals so therefore that makes it a private matter.

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  7. bos5127 says:

    I agree that this is a race relations class but the is a social issue that should be addressed. If you were in this situation you would want someone to talk about it as well. The fact behind the video is why as a society pick and choose issue over others. Why could women feel bad of something that they have no control over. Menstruation is normal. It somewhat intertwines with race. Why should black and brown people feel bad about their race because this is also something that they have no control over? It's unfair to silence one with even boring to listen.

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  8. I feel bad about this subject because as a woman, I can understand both sides of Sam's argument. I agree with him in that yes, this is definitely a male dominated world and that there is definitely some silencing going on thanks to that. But on the other side, I can definitely see how this could be gross. I mean, I have to deal with it and I think it's gross sometimes. Blood is blood whether it's in person on your underwear, dripping in the sink from a paper cut, bleeding out of a body on the nightly news, or shown somewhere on a Discovery Health TV show, and I think it's gross regardless of where it is. I have a girl friend who faints at the sight of it (yes, even the tiniest drop), so to me the "gross" factor comes from the fact that it's blood, not in that it's a thing that only women get. I do think that guys should know more about it though… I mean, Sam's right in that it's just a part of life, so why not just learn about it? I mean, it's not like we're asking you to watch or anything.

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  9. I think that the issue Sam brought up in lecture is very interesting and full of different viewpoints. I find that most guys find the topic disgusting and gross and they refuse to talk about it. Women on the other hand are not disturbed by the topic and I find that they can talk about it openly. I live with three other girls and we complain about cramps and periods all the time. But bring out best guy friends over and mention the word period they freak out and yell about how inappropriate it is.
    I have to agree with Sam when he says that if this was not a man’s world that it would not be viewed as so gross, that it would be accepted as a natural body function and
    people would accept it. Boys would tolerate what happens to girls every month and realize that it’s a cycle that is necessary for life. So in order for them to have children in their later years they need women to get their periods!
    I was talking with my roommates about Tuesdays lecture and we all agree that today’s society would be much different if women ran it. Like Sam said, there would be heating pads in all bathrooms and planes and couches everywhere. We also decided that people would understand that some women get cramps to the point where they can’t get out of bed and that would be an acceptable excuse in the real world. If I were to email my professor and say that I couldn’t come to class because of cramps I would never get away with it. All other women have to suffer through it, so why would I be an exception.
    I think that because this is a “man’s” world that we have things we can and can’t talk about and we learn it from a young age. I know that when I was little I learned that “bathroom talk” was for the bathroom only and you are never supposed to talk about it in public. Periods are something that we take care of in the bathroom, so that applies to the “bathroom talk” rule. But like I said, I think that it is something much more and is something special that, if you think about it, every boy needs to have happen in order to have children.
    I think that this video was awesome and Laurie really gets to say what many women face in the real world. EVERY woman goes through this cycle and has a period once a month. We face challenges with out own bodies, let alone having to worry about what a man will think about it and if he will judge what is happening. In the end I think that men need to accept the face that women get their period once a month and that they will never meet a woman who doesn’t. So suck it up and deal, it’s really not that terrible to accept.

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  10. kazcov16 says:

    I found that Sam’s intro to lecture on Thursday left me feeling perplexed or perhaps torn is a better word. Since I am a woman, I experience this whole menstruation thing. It’s a pain in my ass, and since being blessed with nature’s gift, I have found it generally uncomfortable to speak about. I completely get where Sam is coming from, that this occurrence is natural and even more so, the process responsible for allowing our creation. Although something has happened through the passing of time, many natural processes have become socially taboo to speak about. And I say this with confidence because I experience discomfort when it comes up. If I am sitting on the couch with one of my guy friends and a tampax pearl commercial comes on, for a few milliseconds…things get real weird.

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  11. kazcov16 says:

    This may be completely fabricated, and I may be the only one experiencing these feelings, but none the less, this is my experience. I think that one reason for why menstruation has become a topic infrequently referenced is because as a whole, humanity has made several advancements in disconnecting themselves with nature. This is found in several aspects of our daily lives. Tampons. This is probably an element of the menstruation cycle which makes guys squirm. In theory, or I guess reality, I can understand why. There isn’t anything natural about sticking a condensed piece of cotton into one’s body. I genuinely admire Sam’s empathy for his wife’s natural processes and I try to empathize myself. I try to think or recognize how a man may form his beliefs or discomfort with speaking about periods. The closest I am able to come is when thinking about my first period.

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  12. kazcov16 says:

    This new experience was scary, overwhelming and foreign. Much like it may be for men. I cannot call their reactions ignorant, just lacking. I do not mind that my brother does not want to talk about periods and if he did I would be a little worried. If I am not feeling well and it happens to be mother nature’s doing I feel secure in sharing that without fear of persecution but do not feel it necessary to give too much information. I feel the same way about other natural processes. I do not generally tell people when I file my nails or complain about hunger, I just do something about it in my own time. So once again, I appreciate Sam’s viewpoint on the natural and unique process women go through. He spoke with a passion which I am sure opened the eyes of many college males. Although I still prefer to keep some things to myself. In response to the one video blog that a girl in our class left, “If guys had periods would tampons be free?”….I would predict that tampons would not be free.

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  13. GreekForHire says:

    I guess to be perfectly honest I never really thought much about how adding so much stigma to the topic of women’s periods would in effect force them to fully deny a whole aspect of themselves. I mean, as we’ve discussed, it’s not as if it’s something that women can control, it’s simply a natural bodily function. Course at the same time there are things that guys certainly don’t talk about. I mean, I suppose the male equivalent would be guys and their spontaneous erections. I mean, as with women it’s not something that can necessarily be controlled but it’s something that guys just don’t talk about, even with each other.

    Thought to be perfectly fair, erections are by no means the problem or inconvenience that a woman’s period is. God love em for dealing with that.

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  14. alf5143 says:

    There are two very different issues that I want to address with this post: what Laurie said and what Sam said.

    On the topic of Laurie's monologue, I found it very compelling. She speaks of something that women, across the world, experience on a monthly basis. Something that is stigmatized, for what reason I am not sure? Yes, I've been just like her, suffering through terrible cramps and uncomfortableness, yet unable to discuss it with many people. Over the past 4 years, my boyfriend has learned to be pretty understanding…yet no where near the level of Sam's "understanding". Although he'll talk about my cramps and uncomfortableness, he is in no way comfortable talking about the act of "bleeding". And for his sake, I keep those details to myself, or share them with girlfriends that can relate and sympathize.

    I experience my period every month, so it's not something uncomfortable for me to talk about. However, I don't like talking about blood in general. So whenever someone starts to talk about blood, out of an arm or something, I feel queasy and uncomfortable. For that reason, I don't find it that unreasonable that boys are uncomfortable talking about periods. It's something that they can't experience, so it probably seems a lot worse than it actually is… just like how I imagine excessive arm bleeding of someone else. That being said, I understand where Laurie is coming from, and don’t find it fair that the male dominated world does nothing to help us mediate this problem.

    And now on the topic of what Sam in class. The issue wasn't with the topic he was presenting, but with the way he did it. Talking about your wife's period, specifically the flow of her period, is not called for. I'm not saying this to be crude, but to present the opposite side- how would he react to Laurie sharing the size of his penis or the length of time before he ejaculates? Note, these are both very natural processes/occurrences which was the basis of his argument for sharing that information. If he says he wouldn't care at all- bullshit.

    Him talking about her in that way almost seemed like a way for him to exert power over her. Basically saying, "This is my wife, so I have the knowledge (right) to comment on this." Regardless of the relationship that they may share, her body is not his to share with 700 people. That is as oppressive as all of the things that he preaches about on a daily basis. Surely, I don't think he meant it to come of in this way, and do not think that he feels this way, but I think that a lot of people read it in that way. I understand the educational value of pushing the boundaries, causing us to think in new ways, but when doing so verges on inappropriateness it's not going to have the same educational effect. In being controversial, it's important to take the message that is going to be conveyed into account–grossing people out vs illustrating the oppression. In this case, I think he conveyed the wrong impression, as was clearly shown by the reaction of the class.

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  15. cnr5034 says:

    Maybe I was zoning out but when Sam dropped the conversation on us about periods but I was pretty blown away. I wasn't sure where it came from or how it pertained AT ALL to the class. But he is, after all, a sociologist and so in a way it was a very important issue to discuss, even in a race relations course. Learning to hide your period is a social construction, like everything else in our world it seems. It's a very strange phenomenon but ever since I was 13 I've been extremely shy to talk about it. Obviously, I've grown up and can have a serious discussion about it but that doesn't mean I don't feel awkward discussing it in front of guys. However, I'm not so sure it's completely a social construction issue. When I got my first period I was absolutely terrified. Not so much that there was something wrong with me but the fact that I was changing….my mom hadn't even warned me this would happen. My friends hadn't said anything to me. All I knew were some innuendos made in class and books about it. I was afraid to tell my mom and afraid to tell any of my teachers, even the women teachers. It just didn't seem right and maybe it scared me because I'd heard people refer to it as "you're becoming a woman" but I didn't know what that meant and I didn't want to be a woman. I was only thirteen!

    Today, I still find it awkward to mention it to guys, although I generally date very understanding guys (currently one who grew up with six sisters so he knows the deal). And it's odd that I can't explain where the direct feeling came from but having my period each month has made me feel dirty…but guys don't feel dirty when they fall off a bike and their legs are bleeding?

    I don't like that Sam was trying to teach us something about periods that we didn't know, or at least that's how he was borderline appearing to me. Yeah I know some guys think it's gross, yeah, I know some girls think it's gross. It's a social construction. Well what are we going to do about it? Just like we don't eat certain foods like squid and octupus, our culture might not ever accept that periods are perfectly alright. It really sucks though that guys don't get anything equivalent because it'd be nice if they could be more understanding or on the same playing field. But nothing's fair right?

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  16. snookie10 says:

    I enjoyed listening to this monologue read by Laurie. I look back to the class when Sam Richards talked about Laurie (his wife) “bleeding”. I remember thinking, “Is this guy serious? That is so inappropriate to be saying that in a classroom of 700 students!” I was even a little disgusted. However, after listening to Laurie’s monologue, I now have a new perspective, and that is, “What’s the big deal?” Women should not feel embarrassed or uncomfortable talking about it.
    Most women do not feel as comfortable as Laurie talking about their menstrual cycles. This is because our culture basically teaches us that periods are something that is personal to women.
    Men will never have to go through what women go through each month– mood swings, aches and pains, cramps, etc. Nonetheless, men should be aware of what is going on during a woman’s time of the month, and not feel so weird about it.

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  17. mmillen says:

    In class Sam talked about how every time his wife bleeds he knows it because he can hear her scream expletives from across the house. He then proceeded to try to tell us all about his wife’s menstrual cycle and give us details. He explained that it is a natural process, just like hunger. He had guys who were hungry raise their hands, and then girls who were hungry raise their hands. He said this process is just as natural as eating and we need it to survive. Yes, I agree with what Sam is saying- it is a natural process and women need to menstruate in order for people to survive, but there are many natural processes that are just not normally talked about. He then said that because we are in a male dominated world that is why we do not talk about it. Men think it is disgusting or something that is gross to think about so that is why it is not an acceptable topic to discuss. I can see all his points, but I do not think that is the only reason we do not talk about it. I personally do not have a problem talking about it with people that I know, not because I think it is something “beautiful” like Sam was saying, but because I think it is funny to see people feel awkward. I know some girls who don’t even like talking about it, and obviously some guys who get real uncomfortable- but that is just normal. The reason it’s not commonly talked about is because it is something that is personal and it’s not something that needs to be discussed. It is one of those things like going to the bathroom or having sex. People do it and it is necessary to survive, but you don’t just discuss it with anyone and everyone. It is a personal thing. It’s not because men have pushed women to be quiet about it, it is because even some women don’t want to discuss it. When I get my period I don’t announce it to the world or tell people all the details about it, I just let it happen and go on with my life. Sam says it’s beautiful… I’m a girl and even I don’t think it is beautiful, in fact I think it is pretty disgusting, but it necessary and it has to happen. While I was writing this I told my sister what I was writing about and she grimaced- perfect example. Why did she grimace? Because she said it is a social taboo that people just do not talk about and it is gross. She is a girl and she thinks its gross…sorry Sam. Just don’t tell me about your wife and her cycle.

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  18. sjd5073 says:

    First off I thought it was interesting that a topic like this has been discussed so heavily in a race relations class. I am glad it did though, it was a refreshing change from focusing on the differences between black and white. Instead this topic opposes men and women, but actually unites the races because white, black, or brown women can all relate to menstruation. From the way that Sam talked about it, you can tell that this is something that he is very passionate about, which I think is very flattering to his wife. It sounds like Laurie really struggles and to know that her husband is supportive enough to preach to a 700 person class, with many of whom think he was not being appropriate, is something worth noting. Sometimes I am bothered by the people who react during the large group section, especially in this instance because many people had opinions about his brief comment about bleeding before truly hearing what he was saying, and therefore I think it got blown into a bigger deal then he intended. I personally don’t feel I can relate as much to Laurie’s perspective, because I fortunately don’t get a lot of the pain that can be associated with that time of the month. I do however know that my mood can change drastically; being more emotional is what really bothers me. I don’t like feeling like a ticking time bomb, but hey that is the way it is I guess. I think the idea guys don’t need to know about it, or be understanding, because they don’t have to deal with it, is not valid. I mean if a guy gets kicked in the balls or has any other instances that cause pain down there, the whole world has to know about it, but I get a tampon out in front of a dude and he thinks I should be more discrete about “that thing.” I really don’t see the big deal about it all, I mean if I’m dealing with it and I want to say something about it, then the people around me will listen or they won’t. There are instances where some things are appropriate and some things aren’t, but I think it is like that for many different topics. I wouldn’t have whipped out a tampon in front of the 6th graders I student taught last semester, but if I need to around a group of my guy friends then I will and they should be mature enough to deal with it. It’s not like I’m asking them to come put it in for me or anything, I’m just asking them to respect the fact that I’m going through something that they might not truly understand, but it’s not always pleasant, so bear with me, I’ll be back to normal in a couple days. :)

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  19. Men need to seriously get over the fact that women get their periods. It is something natural that happens, like using the bathroom and burping. Women do not fuss about men who burp all of the time, or use the bathroom, because it is natural. If anything it would be worse because it does not only happen once a month life a period does. Yea we bleed and we get moody, but if it weren’t for that, then human kind would not exist. I think maybe men would feel more comfortable speaking about the subject if they knew what it was. That it was just the process of a women losing one of her eggs. People just need to stop complaining and get their facts straight.

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  20. JayBella says:

    See now, this is different than what was going on in class. This is Laurie, A WOMAN, talking about her life and her experiences as…well, A WOMAN. What was going on in class seems like a whole separate issue. It was about a man discussing private bodily functions of someone that belongs to the opposite sex. It is kind of one of those things that only women can talk about, it is ours. It might as well be our sacred secret. Men are not “allowed” to talk about it if he is not a doctor or he is not talking about it in a very private manner. I feel like this is one of the subjects where it is not a man’s place to talk about it. Not with other women anyway. It is weird, awkward, uncomfortable, and sometimes it can be perceived as disrespectful. On the other hand, it seems like Laurie is venting to other women in this performance (I am not sure if that is actually the case). Who is really her audience? Honestly, I would say she has the authority to talk about this bleeding thing however she wants to. Why? Because she is a woman and she is experiencing the things that she is talking about. She can relate to similar stories from other women, whereas Sam is unable to do this. Any guy who feels like it’s no big deal, I suggest you trade places with Laurie for 28 days and then you can feel free to talk about it however you would like.

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  21. las5545 says:

    Personally, the message I took from this video is that even though women get their period they can still do anything a man can do. And even though we are different, it does not make us less capable of doing everything that they can do, or doing it better. Having your period is discouraging and make daily tasks difficult but we trek through the pain and still perform the same tasks as men and accomplish the same assignment’s. I understand why people got offended in class because the manner in which Sam was talking and the language he was using but I feel he was still trying to get the same point that it should not matter if or when a women has a period because it is natural. (feb 2)

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  22. Jel5191 says:

    I think Laurie is kind of awesome. Like Sam said in class, talking about your monthly cycle is taboo in this man's man world. Why do we as women have to shut up and hide our ways of being womanly and having this monthly cycle that keeps our body healthy and fertile? Isn't that what men look for in us women?… Fertility? and to reproduce their genes, speaking from a biological stand point. I know that we live in a man's world. And women fought for the same rights as men in the early 1900s but that kind of set up this world where women get no sympathy and need to suck it up and shut about our "womanly problems." It is a sad truth. We are weak if we let our cramps or the "time of the month" stops us from doing anything, work, sports, go out, even go swimming. And how many times have women been with men and can not have intercourse because they have their period, yeah men just love that!…just kidding.
    At first when Sam mentioned his wife's twenty eight day cycle I was kind of caught off guard. I was not offended because I am a nursing major and I hear about this sort of stuff all of the time but i thought it was really really bizarre. He said he thought it was beautiful.. That bleeding is beautiful. I think the body is beautiful and the fact that the body is on a twenty eight day cycle and goes through a reproductive stage is beautiful. However, the way this lovely present that comes every 28 days make us as women feel is not beautiful and that is why I felt so taken back by his remark. Sam does not know how us as women feel and he obviously will never so for him to say that he "sort of understands" just kind of pissed me off. Some of us as women feel like we are having out insides ripped out.. How is that beautiful? I mean like i found it quite interesting to hear it from a man's perspective and I do not think it is such a big ordeal that people should walk out of the classroom. What they think a woman goes through. But what Laurie says is quite unique in the fact that she talks about it upfront and does not spare the detail.
    But i did agree with him. I think it that it is total bull shit that women have to hide that they have their period. And i hate that men make society so that us as women must hide it. Now a days i do not care a boy sees a bunch of tampons in my purse but i wont go out and yell that I have my period. I would have raised my hand though if i actually had it.. The next day after the Tuesday class I got it

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  23. mtc5156 says:

    I thought this video was very interesting. It kind of put this whole bleeding topic into perspective. Saying that, even though we are equal with how much money we make, or even though we can beat any boy on the block, it does not matter because women cannot talk about this one thing that makes us woman. It is completely true. I had no problem with what Sam was saying in class. And you can’t really blame him for saying bleeding, if that is what his wife calls it. I think it is pretty cool that they can both be so open about a topic that is so taboo in today’s world.

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  24. "My cycle has repeated like the ties and the sunrise". I thought this quote from Laurie's video was beautiful and it made me think about my menstrual cycle in a more spiritually natural phenomenon. I know females who get their period see it as a burden and it does get in the way of normal day to day activities at least only for the 1st- 2nd day of the menstrual cycle. However, i am not one of those women who stay in bed all week long with cramps and neither are any of the other women i know in my life. I endure the relentless cramping until the aspirin kicks in and i am able to keep it moving. I know there are other women who suffer a lot more pain but i dont let it stop me from doing what i have to get done. I feel that harping on the struggle of the menstrual cycle gets used as a handicap excuse sometimes which is definitely not the case. I dont want pity from men who are suppose to see me as equally intelligent and capable of competing for jobs and meeting deadlines for certain duties i must complete. I've heard males talk about women on their periods as if being on your period is the only reason why a female would be mad or "over emotional". Its upsetting because some men feel women are inferior because they "bleed" for a week every month, as if having your period makes you less intelligent. Or they feel scared your going to flip out and start "pms-ing". Not all females on their period are going to come down your throat. Sure pms symptoms occur and it makes women a little more irritable then they usually would be, but not all women are like that. There is a huge stereotype for the "bitchy pms" female which isn't true for all women. I have learned to embrace my menstrual cycle even though i dont have it as bad as other women who go through serious cramping. I embrace being a woman and everything that comes with that. I bleed once a month because i am a healthy fertile young woman who is able to carry life within me. It is what i was biologically composed to do to ensure the survival of my species. Why earth is often referred to as mother earth? Because of the cycles our planet goes through and because of the life those cycles bring. It makes me feel very close to nature and I don’t see it as a burden personally. Ive dealt with worse pain than cramps.

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  25. ACL says:

    I, as a girl, was not offended when Sam talk about his wife's period. I just did not like the way he kept referring to it; the way he constantly said that his wife was "bleeding" and that girls in the class were "bleeding." And there is nothing wrong with saying that because, in essence, that is what is happening. I personally just did not like it because I get very queasy around the topic of blood and very often faint when I think about it or see a lot of it. The constant ramble with bleeding being every third word or so left me on the verge of almost fainting.

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  26. kar5349 says:

    I think it is nice to have someone who is so comfortable talking about “bleeding” so freely. I personally do not mind talking about it, but kind of only with girls. It is not that I MIND talking about it with boys, but I just…don’t? I do not really know a better way to put it, and I am sure many girls out there understand where I am coming from, even if they do not agree with it. Anyway, as a side note to guys: hormones are crazy things. They can really alter the way a girl feels in so many ways. Personally, the week before my period I usually get really angry at certain people, whether it be my roommate or my best friend. I just want to be left alone and I withdraw, and I sit there thinking to myself “what is wrong with me?” Then I make the connection that my period is starting soon and this stupid PMS is really affecting my life. It is much more annoying to us then it is to you.

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  27. Seriously people, what is the big deal? I mean I understand what some of the deal may be, but why such a big deal? I understand that half of our population doesn't have to experience this painful, annoying, and uncomfortable thing called period, but guess what? HALF of the population does? So sure, let's just forget about it and not talk about it. Ever. But oh you know what, for those of us who do get it, it's a little flippin' hard to just forget about it as some of you do! You see, we can try to forget about it, but then in a month or so we better wake up and remember because we have to run to the store in time to buy pads and tampons and then watch and feel ourselves bleed…for days. Not for an hour, not for a day – for several days. And for many of us it can be extremely painful and it can ruin each and every one of our plans. For instance my friend in high school had such bad cramps that she would just sit there and cry, and her ridiculous mother made her go to school. And some days, it was so bad that she didn't show up at school, her mom couldn't even make her go because the girl couldn't even get up! And she has to deal with this every month along with the rest of the majority of our female nation. And you want to just forget about it? Not talk about it? I mean, by what standards should that be okay? I'm sorry to rant like this, but that's the only thing we can do at this point. I mean, this is outrageous.

    Sam was right when he pointed out that why is that almost every other natural phenomenon is okay and normal? Why can we say to our friends that we have to pee, but not that we are on our periods? Of course, most of this applies to girls talking to guys, although I am disturbed to say that even some girls would refuse to talk to another girl about their period because they think it's gross. Look honey, how can you seriously say that it's gross when it happens to you just the same? How can you deny or justify that? Girls like that just disgust me.. And speaking of guys, I refuse to go out with a guy who won't be accepting of my little monthly friend and who won't be able to utter the word 'period.' Because then, to me he is just immature. If you are going to be in a serious relationship, how can you just ignore and overlook a natural phenomenon that happens to our bodies each and every month. You are ready to get all up in there the second you get a chance, yet you cringe as soon as you think about the fact that we bleed from THERE?? Well guess what, if it's that disgusting, you may want to stop putting your body part in our blood disposal because it's just so disgusting. And that actually makes me think of another point as well.. There are things besides periods that seem to be taboo to talk about. For instance often, if a girl wants to say something to a guy about a certain body part, he is quick to say, "Ewww." But at night all that goes away and a guy will feel up any part of your body and no, he doesn't put a glove on or anything. Amazing.

    There is also a whole other dimension when it comes to how certain cultures and religions deal with periods. Here, I can understand a little more why certain women act in certain ways. But I'm still angry, wondering why the hell the customs have to be that way. I just can't blame the women as much. For instance, I heard that in some country(India I think…?) when girls are on their period, they can't enter the the temple and I think something like they can't even pray(?) Now that makes me mad. That is just saying, as a whole religion, that periods are bad and you should be ashamed of them! Heck, they might as well say that God hates people who are menstruating. Well then, let me ask you a question, why the hell did God then create these periods? Oh maybe so that all of you could be here today and we could continue birthing your children! Let me give you another example, the way periods are handled by the culture in my country irks me. As soon as I got my period, my grandma taught me to be ashamed of it. Thanks grandma. (Don't worry, I'm fine now, I've retaught myself.) She always made it a big deal that the men in the house get some kind of hint that we may be on our periods. Hide your pads and tampons! Don't talk about it! Make sure you throw it in the right trash cans! I've always wanted to yell, "What the fuck, grandma! You think my dad thinks that just because he will never see a tampon laying around he will think that I must not ever get my period!? And god forbid he sees a pad, he will love me less because I'm normal and I get my period!?" I wish I could tell her that. And many other grandmas and women in my country. And other countries…

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  28. ezf5009 says:

    This menstruating thing is relatively random for a race relations class. I mean personally I get Sam’s point, and I think it is a valid one. We should definitely take into account what women go through and how their lives are different from men, and certainly have increase hurdles like hormonal fluctuations that cause crazy feelings. I do not think most men truly understand what the like of a woman is like. Sure most women strive to be equal, when physiologically they are not, I think it would be a different world if men really tired to understand how different women’s lives are.
    So I’m all for the bleeding talk, but at the same time think it’s a little weird. I also think it’s good to have this talk, because there are many women who do not have similar bleeding issue to Laurie. I have plenty of friends who have light periods without much uncomfort, besides dealing with the hassle of dealing with blood. So cheers to the bleeding talk. We should all be more considerate for women, especially those who menstrual issues.
    I guess that’s why there is a push to make bad menstrual symptoms a clinical problem. It’s just as much a condition as allergies or something else. I think the real conversation should be based around the stigma associated with women and their “periods.” Because by making heavy bleeding and intense menstrual problems a medical condition you bring along the stigma of a disease. And who wants to have a problem anyway?
    So I don’t know if that’s the right choice either. . . Instead, maybe we should just be considerate of women and how their bodily functions differ from men’s. Women have added complications to deal with in their day to day lives.
    Oh if women ruled the world. How would things be different? From a past post, I don’t think tampons would be free, but maybe we would all get a week off a month. . . who knows, but things we certainly be different.
    I commend Laurie for talking about her menstrual cycle and how it has changed many life experiences. I really resonated with me when Sam talked about how Laurie needed to plan her life on a 28-day cycle. I can’t imagine how my life would differ by planning according to a cycle, and knowing that each month I would suffer. And men wonder why women can be moody or short-tempered . . . you name it. Men should learn to respect women and understand why they may be acting the way they are.
    Overall, this is a difficult topic, especially when it only affects 50 percent of the populations and they divide that percent by however many women do not have severe symptoms.

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  29. When Sam talked about “ bleeding” and women getting their periods in class I was completely appalled. I was one of the people who voted that Sam was completely out of line and did not know what he was talking about. I was pretty upset in the way that he talked about it and I also did not understand why he made such a point to talk about it. I think of it as a private issue like going to the bathroom that does not need to be discussed. I don not want to hear anyone say that they just took a “ huge shit” and I also do not to here people talk about their period.
    However yesterday when that time of moth came I decided that maybe Sam was right. Since High school my period has been very ill regular and I am fortunate to only have it a few times a year. (Not because of medicine) But this being said all the symptoms are escalated.
    I woke up yesterday with two huge twin zits on my chin that were the size of my eyeball. My completion is generically very clear thanks to proactive but the day I am going to get my period I get the hugest zit imaginable. This happen the morning of my senior pictures and on the morning of my high school graduation b/c my period always seams to be present for big events. And yesterday the day I was going to meet up with this guy who I really like and yesterday was going to be the day that we stopped just talking. As soon as I looked in the mirror a certain 4-letter word entered my mind and I reached 4 my zit cream and cover up.
    I went to class and went about my day and they went to get ready 4 a party where this guy invited me. I decided to ditch the outfit that I had been planning on wearing b/c I felt and looked 15-pound heavier b/c of all the water weight my body retained and because I crave junk food like it is my job before I get my period. So I instead wore a huge dress that made me look like I had no shape b/c I felt so fat.
    My cramps started to get a lot worse and I called my mo mom like clockwork and she told me to take something which of coarse I already had and I sat on my bed and got ready to get sick from my crams.
    I got my act together and went to this party with all my friends but had to bring a purse like a mom because I did not know where to put my tampon. And I never responded to this guy’s text until I left b/c I did not want to see him looking fat with a huge zit on my face.
    It occurred to me last night that despite what I often say my period does affect my life and that it does influence my actions.
    I started to reflect on how I paid to have my “ period zit” photo shopped out of my senior pictures, how I would only stand on one side of graduation pictures, how many places I had randomly brought a bag bc I needed one 4 tampons , and in middle school 1st bringing my pencil bad to the bathroom and everyone asking why ?, I thought about calling my mom to come home for cramps, about how once a boy saw my tampon stri g sticking out of my bathing suit and how embarrassed I was, how my mom was mortified when my guy friend saw me unpacking tampons on move in day freshman year and my mom immediately hid them and laughed and said I have a sister, all the emergency trips to happy harries @ the beach when I forgot to pack tampons and randomly got my period, and all the events I was not my self at because it was that time of month, all the times I refused to get in a bathing suit b/c I was bloated, about my best friend now swimming when she went to camp in 8th grade bc she had her period and was afraid of tampons, about my friend having her period @ thon and how it made the 46 hours just a little bit harder.

    So maybe Sam was not so far off when he talked about this. It does impact my life. And although I will never ever go around and talk about it. It would be very nice if boys were more aware.

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