Posted by Sam Richards
I’m not sure if people realize that Laurie wrote this book while sitting through hundreds of SOC 119 discussion groups each year a while back. Because she was the supervisor for the TAs she couldn’t speak and respond to different things that people would say–both white students and students of color. So I encouraged her to put her thoughts down in writing so that I could use them in class. The book very much focuses on “race relations” and not inequality and social justice and the like.
The thing that I got most out of reading Laurie’s book is actually this point about race relations. I went to a required race relations group last semester for HDFS 301 and really enjoyed the experience. It was a place where you could generally say what you were feeling about relations pertaining to race, in a very open environment and not feel judged. It was also a place where I learned so much about what others thought about race, especially what black and brown women thought. A couple of weeks later I got an email stating that Sam’s SOC 119 class was kind of a continuum of this open race talking session so I decided to join the class. Then when reading Laurie’s book, it gave me a whole new perspective on the race relations meeting. I did not state above that when I went to the group, I was the first, second or even sixth person to talk because I was the last person to talk. I also did not realize how just like Laurie and Sam have said, that when I went into the room I sat back and waited for the black and brown people to talk. I waited for these “experts” to talk and watched what I said so that I did not offend them. Also, I felt out the other white people in the room and listened to their stories and how the felt on race before I shared. When one white girl shared that her boyfriend was racist and she wasn’t racist but didn’t have any black or brown friends, I felt like I was in the clear because my best guy friend is black, I have always been good friends with Mexicans and blacks, and even dated a mixed (half white, half black) guy for a couple of months. Through reading Laurie’s book and attending Sam’s lectures, I have learned how this perception about being in the clear to talk just because I had black friends was completely wrong. I still had and have so far to go in learning about other races and need to really listen to what these people are saying about their experiences in life just for having a different color of skin. Also, I need to share with them my perceptions about race and how I am very open to race so that they can learn something too because they really are not the experts either. Luckily through the things I have learned in Sam’s class and the aspects of race relations that Laurie has pointed out in her book, I will be able to go into my race relations group in a few weeks and jump right into the conversation without having fears about what others will think, but most of all I will really be able to hear and listen to what others are saying.
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Why do you have to go to a race relations discussion to feel comfortable to talk about race? Wouldn’t it be great to be able to talk about these things in normal life? People who attend things meanings are usually open minded and looking to help and make solutions however the real world is not like this. The whole world should be a race relations group and if you seem racial injustice it should be pointed out the way you would help out a person if they were being physically attacked on the street. It is your business even if it is not because everyone is equal. It may seem like a long shot to have the world as a large relations group but in reality is that not the eventual goal? I feel it is the eventual goal and if it is not the goal than it should be.
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yesec9 Reply:
March 19th, 2010 at 9:33 pm
The closed environment is the first step for many people who wouldn't dare come out of their shell in real life and consider even facilitated discussion a step forward. The fact is that even if you are comfortable about talking about race, others aren't. Being comfortable about talking means that you are prepared for whatever consequences may come your way should you say such things. If you are capable of talking about these things, some will look at it and think it's racist. I feel like many people are not comfortable with those risks that come along with coming out of their shell.
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oliviak Reply:
March 19th, 2010 at 8:52 pm
i agree with you. I feel as if it would be more natural to go off of your own intuition in these kinds of things. Why does one have to be conditioned first to be able to talk about race issues. Why should one have to be sensitive to others feelings, when others are so insensitive. If that was the case, why aren't children taught how to be racially aware and sensitive in school. We are learned the basics by our schools and families. You know everyone is equal and just like you, treat everyone with respect. The meetings are cover-ups and badges that read, "I know your pain, I can relate" when in all actuality you just sat through a seminar and bounced race ideas off one another, that doesn't change a person who has years of outside influences.
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The thing that I want to get out of both SOC 119 and also reading Laurie's book is that feeling of not just acceptance and tolerance of all people, no matter their race, sexual orientation or social situation, because that is how I was brought up, but a feeling of at least trying to understand where people of different races are coming from so I can attempt to understand them better, as well as converse with them. I truly want everyone to be equal and for all of us to get along regardless of race. More than that, I want people to get along without hiding or changing part of themselves to do it. I'm sure these thoughts seem stupid or naive, but that's how I feel.
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I think that what I got out the book was to simply give every person we meet and see a chance. There are so many people in this world and this means there are so many opportunities learn new ways of life and things everyday. I think that once we pass the race barrier and the perceptions of other people we can open our minds so much to different aspects and experiences in life. I like this book because it offered a real commentary, ideas and thoughts on what she was going through and feeling at each moment of the book and moment of her life. Although simple in structure it is it is real and says everything that each of us may be thinking, which allows the audience to relate. I think my outlook is getting better of different peoples, but at the same time it still is very hard to change what I have known for so long in life.
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The "Brown v. Board of Education" of 50 years ago was perhaps the most significant school reform implemented in American education. The goal of this landmark court decision was to end public school segregation and introduce racially integrated schools. Now in the 21st century, we argue that the hope and promise of "Brown v. Board of Education" has not been realized. Many public schools are still segregated and those that are racially and ethnically integrated face segregated classrooms as a result of white flight and college tracking. We argue that "Brown v. Board of Education," the most racially explicit school reform enacted in 50 years, can be made more effective through additional racially minded and social justice reforms. Specifically, public school administrators and teachers can promote racial equity academically and socially by promoting learning opportunities, shaping discussion and open dialogue about race, and developing multicultural curriculum. I think it all starts at the elementary grade levels. If children are not taught about race relations and aren’t made to feel comfortable talking about race, when will they ever? It just continues to get worse and kids are sheltered and continue to hang out with friends of the same race. After reading Laurie's book, I gained much insight about race relations and how to go about discussing issues that made me feel a little bit uncomfortable. I don't consider myself racist or biased against people of different races, but I will admit that I am sometimes uncomfortable talking about certain race issues. I think the most important thing that this book taught me was that I should be open and willing to talk about issues.
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In my opinion, Laurie’s book was a whole mix of stories trying to get one point across. I did like the book overall but some parts confused me a bit. I feel like Laurie is a very strong person in how she handled herself throughout the book but I think she could have defined her role a bit more. The girl in the video here seemed to have been personally responsive to Laurie’s book which is probably Laurie’s goal. To understand the difference between blacks and whites is most likely very difficult and for someone white’s personal experiences to effect a person of color is just one step towards finally making peace.
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I agree with what this woman is saying about how Laurie’s book made her open her eyes more to the opposite color. I absolutely loved that book. It helped me realize where others were coming from too and that I am not the only race that is afraid to talk about my feelings regarding race relations. I think this book would be an excellent book for every race to read just so everyone gets a little incite to understand when people say things it isn’t meant to be racist. I liked all of the individual stories in this book also I felt they added to the message being portrayed.
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I feel I definitely benefited from reading Laurie’s book. We usually are only stuck in our own bubble or “box” as she puts it and are blinded to how others view the world. We only see the world through our lenses and very little do we experience a different view through others. The book enabled me to do just that though. The book not only helped me understand where others were coming from, but also where my thoughts that I subconsciously go into situations with come from. I am definitely more self aware of race relations and the psychological nature of it.
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After reading Laurie’s book, I feel like I benefitted from her perspective. She talked about things that most people don’t talk about, besides in SOC 119 classes. The one story that stuck out most to me was the one about Sam being regarded as a racist man. This story was the epitome of the fear that people have when they enter into a race relations discussion. No one wants to be regarded as a racist and in some cases, they simply can’t help but come off as such (even if it is not intention or meant). But, at the same time, this is the reality. Every time that I have been involved in a race relations discussion, it has gone two ways. Either I am in the minority or I am in the majority of the racial circle. In my first discussion experience, I was one of two white people. I found this circle incredibly fascinating and yet the most fearful. I grew up in an urban area and have quite a bit of racially diverse friends even though I am a white girl. Going into the circle, I talked to them like I talked to my friends back home. I was immediately looked at as being too comfortable talking with them because I was different and yet acted no different. I think this turned some people off and I felt I was always on the defensive for the rest of that discussion. But, for my second discussion experience, there was only one Latina girl in my group and the rest of us were white. This experience was not as fulfilling as the first because I didn’t talk much and was more reserved with what I said. I think Laurie’s book is very beneficial because not only is it talking about these discussions from the black/brown usual perspective but it is talking about if from a white perspective as well.
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Lauries book didn’t really introduce that many “new” ideas into my head but it definitely reinforced a lot of my beliefs. I pride myself on the ability to look at one situation from multiple perspectives. In the movie Dead Poets Society a professor encourages his students to learn that ability. “The minute you think you know something, look at it from a different angle.” Laurie does a very concise job in illustrating this throughout her book. Some people are so open minded that their brains fall out, others are too pigheaded to have anything enter it. Somewhere in between these two extremes lies the answer.
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I think that the most important thing and what Sam has been trying to get everyone to do is to open up about race topics. I know its said a lot in class and what not but I think the main part is just learning to listen to what others have to say to try and understand where they are coming from in order to understand them more and learn something new. I think that a lot of the times it is really easy to just become so defensive the minute someone says something about a particular race but I feel like people should just try to take the time and understand why they have a particular view about something.
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The reason that I took soc 119 was to become more open racially and to be able to talk about race without feeling weird about it. After reading Laurie’s book I believe that this is doable I just have to try harder and pretend that I am always sitting inside of the race relations circle. Once that happens I should be able to talk to other people about race, religion, or any other topic that comes out. The only problem that I have with that is I would still be very worried with saying something that someone of color takes as offensive.
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oliviak Reply:
March 19th, 2010 at 8:57 pm
i feel people should stop being afraid on stepping on another's toes. That's how we learn what is correct or impolite to say to another person of a different race from our own, everything we say is not going to be politically correct. That's why we learn from others. Of course we don't know about other races in depth as much as we wish we could without hurting anyone' feelings, but that simply isn't the case, that's why we feed off of eachother. If a person takes offense to what another oblivious person says about his or her race, that person isn't secure within himself, or just being close-minded and pig headed.
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I really enjoyed reading Laurie’s book because even though it discussed a lot of race relations it was neat to have someone’s point of view displayed on the side of white people not intending to be racist but we get accused of that a lot. I also thought it was a good point on Sam’s part to advise us not to try to argue ourselves out of being accused of making a racist comment. It can be very hurtful to be accused of being a racist so I think a lot of people would want to try to defend themselves against an accusation like that.
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I really liked this video post for two reasons: one- I really enjoyed Laurie's book as well and thought it was a great read for people to truly see the white perspective and understand it, and two- it was refreshing and really reassuring to see this video post from a black women because as she said it really helped her to be more open minded when it came to how and why white people may react the way they do. I think this post relates extremely well to the lectures we had this week as well. I would say that I am very comfortable talking about race with blacks and browns (being that I am white), I have a lot of relatives that fall into those categories because of marriage and lots of cousins who are mixed due to it. But having friends and aquaintances who are not as comfortable, I have seen first hand the awkward and quite reaction that my white friends will have when faced with the issue of race. I was thankful to Sam for making the point that just because white people do not speak up, does not mean they are racist. It truly has been taught and ingrained in us to not acknowledge race. And when some of us do , there is a high probability that a black or brown person will say something back to us to make us feel like we said or asked something wrong. I obviously know that it is not all black and brown people that tend to put down and react strongly to a white person bringing up race, but it is common. I would hope that more black and brown people would be more open and understanding to the fact that for many people it is very uncomfortable to talk about race because of the culture and society we were taught in. I also really liked Sam's point about not backing down from statements that you said and not trying to defend yourself when it happens. It really does make situations worse when you start to stutter and try and take back your words. Defending your statements truly does little good, a simple sorry for offending you would really work just fine. The person may be upset, but they will get over it unlike when people begin making excuses situations tend to escalate and become much worse. I really think this class should be required for all students! Unlike what that old senator said on the video about talking about race to much, I do not think there is ever to much talk about race. The more informed people are, the less judgmental people will be. People would be much less likely to bash or talk trash on a race if they had a friend who was that race. I Think people should acknowledge color and be afraid to say "the black guy over there", or "that white girl here" . I have yet to meet a black or brown person who would be offended if i called them, black or brown, just like I would never be offended by someone describing me as white. It is a characteristic, one that should be seen but not judged.
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Additional Blog #2
I agree with the young lady in the blog. Thanks to Laurie Mulvey’s book Making Peace Between the Colors, I think that a lot more people will begin to take heed to what Sam is saying about placing yourself in someone else’s shoes.
Yes at times it will be hard to imagine yourself in someone else’s shoes because you are not them. But if we as a people, a whole learn to have genuine empathy for one another, a lot of the trouble between the different races could be avoided. Let ago of those silly stereotypes. Trying to understand one another’s race or one another overall is the true key to successfully understanding race relations as well as having a better world to live in.
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I think the most important concept I took from Lauries book is the idea that mending the space between races is a two sided effort. We cant just rely on the other side to fix the issues we have, rather we need to collaborate and (however cheesy it may sound) join forces against these racial divides. It is fairly obvious to most people that the majority of adults in todays society need to participate in some sort of race relations experience to help focus on their perhaps corrupted past. Although this is certainly a need, the likelihood of it being met is unfortunately slim.
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I like this comment because before I read the book I had friends who told me how boring and how much of a waste of time the book was going to be, and how it would take me forever to read it because it wasn’t a page turner of horror like the other book we had to read for the first exam. I realize now that those people were also all colored like me, but they went all colored schools, and though they make friends with other races now and all the time that doesn’t make them as open as they might think.
I enjoyed how Laurie’s book Making Peace Between the Colors showed me a lot, some things that I already knew and some I didn’t. I felt as if I was kind of able to have a conversation without even talking, and because I was reading a book, I felt the environment that I was being given so much new or sensitive information so much more beneficial. And I’m a person who hates to read like there’s no freakin tomorrow. If she were to attempt say all that she had to say in the middle of class, and I say attempt because no one would let her get through the first twenty pages with out comment or argument. I feel like there is already so much serious emotion and tension flowing through the crowd every time Sam says one little thing, for Laurie to just say everything in her book, (a book that is primarily the white point of view and how other races don’t understand it) there would be outrage. Even I didn’t realize that I was reluctant to completely hear the full extent of their point of view but Laurie’s book really showed me a thing or two.
I feel that in order to absorb the point of view she was giving, one would really have to read the emotionlessly and objectively. Because I feel like if there was an instance when I did not agree with something she said I would have tired my self out trying to fight with a point of view that was already written down and already expressed.
When she began in book, she tells us how she was raised, what she was told, how she felt, and how she changed her beliefs when she got older, and we also know what her job is and she also spoke of her brothers childhood. And while reading those examples of race situations, her, her brother, etc. all got in, I feel like it was easier to understand their point of view. I now kind of feel that it’s a little unfair that one would need or have to give so much explanation, before that simply say what their point of view is, so there isn’t a huge argument. I don’t think ALL colored people have to do a background story before we decide to say point of view like ALL white people; and even in saying this I am uncomfortable admitting it but I know its true.
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axs1007 Reply:
March 19th, 2010 at 11:43 pm
I think the book was a page turner. This is because it seemed as if she was actually speaking to me. I could almost hear the words that were written inside my head, as if I was just having a conversation with her. It flowed so easily. It was most definitely not a waste of time. And, it did not take forever to read. The second I sat down to read it, I actually wanted to keep reading, keep listening to the intelligence and the messages being sent. I could not do the same with the first book. I had to read that throughout a long time period, take breaks, and come back to it. It was different for this book though. Maybe because I can relate to everything she was saying.
I too thought the fact that it was written down and not an actual coversation was very beneficial. It gave me a chance to really take it all in, to listen without defensively responding. It made such an impact on me. I definitely agree with the fact that emotion would take over instantly if Laurie said these messages out loud to the class, any of it. It wouldn't have been taken in the same way. It's sad but so true. It's human nature to talk, to defend, to argue. It would have such a different affect if it was read out loud in class. It's hard, in person, to control emotions when having a conversation about such issues. Emotions normally get the best of us. But the best way to have a conversation is to think logically, not emotionally. We came across this realization in my discussion group. Furthermore, I find that I think the best when I write, when I actually have time to think. This is because I am not going to be defensive, or feel attacked. I can just read it, take it in, and realize new things.
The book made a difference in the person's life who made this blog. And in the person whose comment I am responding to. And in mine. And it probably made a difference in a lot of other people's lives. That's incredible to me. Like a domino effect. Furthermore, it made me think in such a different way, making me see so many different perspectives of people. I opened my eyes in a new light, to a lot of the issues that were addressed in the book.
Peace between the colors. It's really great that this book made the girl who posted the blog realize new things and think about other perspectives. Realizations and change are what makes us grow. It's really great. And I think that was the purpose of her book, to get people to see the other side. To realize that it's you and me, not just one of us. We're in it together. In order to get along, we have to realize things of this nature. And after reading this book, it makes us much more aware of everything.
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I think that it is important for people to be able to see race from another person’s perspective. It is important that another person is able to do this so that they can get a feel for how a black person feels or a white person feels, or another person of color feels when they are presented with issues dealing with their race. I am a white male and I think that I could gain a better understanding of the problems dealing with race if I could see these issues through the perspective of a person of color. I have an idea of what life is like, but obviously nobody can fully understand the experience, especially since they could never put themselves in another person’s shoes.
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I very much agree with this video comment, I am right there with her. This book, even more then some of the classes we experience with Sam, made me perceive situations differently and really think about what people that are not white are thinking, as well as what I as a white person is thinking, and may not have fully realized it. I also think it was an influential book for many other students as well because at my discussion group different stories from that book were brought up at least four or five times. People kept going back to that book in order to explain what they were feeling or to express surprise in learning something new.
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apd24 Reply:
March 20th, 2010 at 12:38 am
I definitely agree with the statement that I have now been opened up what people of other races are thinking when discussing racial issues. As a white person I never really knew what other races were thinking in a lot of situations and now its apparent that they don't really know what us as white people are thinking either. Basically there is a lot of misunderstanding when it comes to race relations and the best way to get past this is to simply express how you feel and not be so 'politically correct' and afraid of offending people.
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I like the comment because I am glad to hear that people of color are understanding what Laurie is saying in the book. Laurie pretty much states exactly how I feel when talking to black people. I am constantly worried and afraid that I will say something wrong and be labeled as racist. I feel like sometimes it's easier just not to talk at all, even when opinions are screaming in my head. I feel like because of everything that black people have gone through they have very strong beliefs and therefore are extremely difficult and very intimidating to argue with. In an RRP group that I had to do last semester for a class we were talking about how one of the worst things someone can call a white person is a racist. I think that it is a huge fear held by white people and reading Laurie's book showed me that I shouldn't let that stop me for giving my opinions. I really hope that Laurie's book helps people of color to understand that most white people are not trying to be rude or offensive at all and that we want to learn about them just as much as they want us to understand them.
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After attending our required race discussion and reading the book it I obvious that they benefit everyone who is partaking in them. However, I find it weird that you need to have a designated time and place for a race discussion. Is it so people can prepare themselves to participate in something outside of their comfort zones? I felt no different going to the discussion than I do walking to class. Race discussions and the book Sam’s wife wrote our eye opening experiences for people who do not have the privilege of living in a diverse community. I think they need to be designated so people will let their guards down and ask the things they need to, to develop as an open minded person.
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I am really glad that we were assigned to read Laurie Mulvey’s book about race relations. I liked the perspective that she took in the book. It was really interesting to get a sense about the different views different races have about race relations. For previous classes at Penn State, I have had to participate in a race relations group discussion, and I have had a different experience each time. And everytime walking out of the discussion group, I have had many thoughts about my own race relation opinions, and the opinions of the other races. So this book was a great way to take a look at race relations from different races.
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I think that Laurie's book was very insightful for people to really see what it is like through the eyes of different races as well as the mannerisms of people when they get caught in a tough situation dealing with race. The perspective that she took in the book was very interesting and i like that she was able to give people another outlook on race relations of people of other races.
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I agree with the response from my classmate, “who is finally getting it”. Personally I believe, “I am finally getting it”. As a person of mixed race, who is primarily perceived as a white woman, I am able to identify with both “teams”. Although I have grown up in a primarily white area, and attended a predominately white college, I have many black friends and identify whole heartedly with my black family members. I believe this gives me a unique perspective. This perspective has been reinforced by liberal media and throughout numerous racial debates. My view on race relations was steadfast and unwavering; this class however has changed that perspective. After learning about causes for inequality and the ways in which our society perpetuates its racist social structure, I am changed. I have also learned about the “white perspective”. As Sam mentioned in class, most white people do not acknowledge race relations or the issues surrounding the topic. For the first time I am considering what it must be like to come to the race table, as a white person. For the first time I am considering “white guilt”. Although I am half white, I have always identified with my black heritage when discussing race. I have always believing that establishing my race gives me credibility and clout when discussing race. Now I realize that everyone comes to the race table with just as many experiences as I have, and just as many opinions as I do. I can finally see others perspectives and have finally stepped out of myself and opened my eyes to new people and new ideas. I finally understand that not everyone has experienced what I have and at the end of the day, we are all human, and subject to the forces and factors around us.
On the topic of forces and factors I am frustrated and confused. In a capitalist world it is hard to grasp that everyone doesn’t have the same advantages or the same opportunities. I am a prime example of opportunity. I was fortunate enough to be born into a two parent, upper middle class family, in a thriving and safe neighborhood. I was lucky enough to attend a competitive high school and gain acceptance into a prestigious and well known university. Although I worked hard and achieved good grades, my entire future was set up before me. Who knows if I would have accomplished the same things, if I had been born into another family, or even into a different school district? My success is certainly attributed to my hard work but I must also consider the social institutions which got me there. The fact that everyone does not have the same opportunities as me, or the chance to succeed is honestly depressing. In a capitalist society, it is hard to imagine a life different from my own, however the poverty and suffering around me is impossible to ignore.
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After reading Laurie Mulvey’s book, I realized that white people should not be the only ones looked at as “racist” or prejudice. I guess I always knew that, but her book brought my attention to the issue even more. I was a bit angered by the attitudes of the non-white people in the race relations groups because they were the ones being ignorant. They did not even bother to take the time to listen to the white people and just accused them of being the ignorant ones.
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I just felt that we have such an inappropriate view of ourselves, and we love to act like we are the innocent ones in the race game. I thought being racist meant that you have prejudice attitude against a person of another color. Nowhere in that “definition” does it say that it means white people have a prejudice attitude against people of color.
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Therefore, anybody can be racist. Being a person of color, I have seen this happening first-hand. It happens amongst my family members and friends. While I do not agree with their comments usually, I am surrounded by such racist remarks about people who are “white” and “black”. I am sure a lot of people can identify with me in this aspect since most of us come from families with some racist attitudes. For example, family members may be opposed to the children dating a person of a different color.
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I know that my family members would be opposed to me marrying someone outside of their color. I realize that many of our racist attitudes come from our families and the environments we grew up in. Coming to college, I have realized how much my family’s attitudes affected my own before. I have changed my attitude towards different people and do not have the same attitudes towards certain people like my family does.
College opened up my eyes through the classes I have taken and the people I have interacted with. This makes me realize the importance of getting away from your home and interacting with people different than you because you really learn to change your way of thinking. Your attitudes and behaviors towards people change, and you become more open-minded. I have changed my attitudes and way of thinking because I am away from my family so much.
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kjr198 Reply:
March 20th, 2010 at 2:50 am
College has really opened up my eyes in that aspect too. My parents would disown me if I married a person of color. No questions asked, I'd be out the door. I grew up in a small town in western pa and there was one person of color in my entire high school, and he never acted the stereotype. I'm so thankful that I came to college, for much more than just the degree. I've made friends of all different colors, otientations and backgrounds. People that my parent's never would have let me meet in our small circle. I'm so grateful because I now can look past color to the person beneath.
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I can finally think for myself without my family influencing my thoughts. All in all, Laurie’s book was eye opening and effective in showing a different side to the race relations table. I now see that white people are not the only racist ones in the world. Black and brown people can be, too! Maybe we should all try to put ourselves in the shoes of people of different color instead of judging them and trying to guess what their attitudes really are.
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I am colored as well and I often see that white people are not really given a fair opportunity at times to speak, but they also never try to like Sam says they often just sit back and don’t get involved in racial issues, because they feel that if they say something it may offend someone and it will come back to them as the white person said this. I am around white people a lot at times many of my friends are white and we mess around at times about racial issues and kid around, but at times when we are talking with other people that we don’t know as well as we know each other, my white friends tend to take it easy and not speak to much regarding this issue. And when I ask them why they didn’t say anything they simply say its better when we don’t say anything because if we offend someone it gets taken out of proportion, and that is true if I say something to a white person regarding racism they will take it, but if the question comes back can I really take it? I understand that white people are not given a fair chance when it comes to this, but if they try to speak their minds and say what they feel people will at least respect them more for doing something like that. But after reading the book and the lectures in class I am starting to understand better the white persons stance in the situation and why they act the way they do.
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Overall, I really enjoyed this book. In the beginning I was breezing through the chapters and thinking to myself, “this is stupid, I get it already.” I did not really see the whole meaning behind the book. Finally, it started to click in me and I was finally getting it. All of the different examples Laurie gave really made me think about things differently. White people are not the only prejudice people in this world. There are so many other races that are just as racist as whites are too. I think I get the whole point of the book, however I don’t think I will actually “get it” until I am put into a real life situation on my own.
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When I read the book, I thought the author of this book shares pretty much common thoughts with Sam, and here is the reason why! Now, I can call it “like the husband, like the wife” style since many contents of the book provided another (or non-common or philosophical) perspective that I have not thought of. Especially, the first part of the book which talked about the brother-in-law who can be called a person with least biases and stereotypes but finally labeled as a “racist” due to his jokes made the complexity hidden behind the general talking which connects to the “reality”
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I can so relate to many statements made by Laurie Mulvey in her book. I am, by nature, I believe a friendly openhearted person. I really do not care what color or sexuality you are. I just want to be friends with everyone. As a white person, I will smile at you (all) as you walk by. I do see the returned exchange from you wondering whether my smile is genuine. I work in retail part-time and I run across all cultures, especially in this town. And all look at me and wonder, “Is she smiling because she is required to? Is she smiling because she is patronizing me?” I see those type responses that wonder whether I truly care. The answer is that I do. I have already gone through (and at times still) feeling guilt. The only way I can correct the wrong done is to reach out and genuinely love all. I am by no means saying though that I know how to communicate totally with you without offending you. I don’t think I have enough practice yet. I smile with sincerity, but not one of you have stopped and said hello. I say hello to you in the store, but it goes over your head without acknowledgement really. Oh, you will be polite and maybe give me a half smile back … but no one yet has stopped and said hello. What does it take to start open communication? Are we both too afraid? Too shy? I cant believe that … is there something else?
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I agree with the young lady that made this comment about Laurie’s book in the fact that I like to hear other points of view other than my own. I consider myself to be very open-minded and I think that while reading her book I feel like I really am taking in what she is expressing. I understand her point of view and her reasoning and her arguments. It might seem unusual but I am glad that she wrote the book in the manner that she did, completely aware of the reactions that would explode in other people’s heads when reading a certain story or comment or quote. I appreciate her scolding of “my people” for the things that are sometimes overlooked in our own cultures. I often feel like when I am listening to my people of color speak on these race relations issues I try to forget about our skin and only listen to their words. Then I decide if they make sense to me, if I agree, if they are genuine and ethical. I have no problems disagreeing with my own people or with white people. There are plenty of times where I feel like some of my people “embarrass” me by doing things that support negative stereotypes shaped by ALL people. Kind of like how in class Sam showed us the videos that were making fun of other white people who were ignorant to what was really going on in society. Should I feel this embarrassment? Who knows? Should it matter? In one way I feel that I should because I identify with those very people. But on the other hand, if I’m striving to be looked at as an individual and not for my skin color, then why am I so concerned with separating myself from the “typical” view of a black person? There are so many questions that are raised through my thought process. One of the most relevant is “what is the ‘typical black person’ to white people? And what about to other black people? And what about in between?” If Sam is trying to get us to think, it’s working over here.
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Because my discussion group was a few weeks into class, I already felt more open to the people that I was going to be discussing with. I have not had many interactions with people of other races here at Penn State so it was the first time I had a chance to express my new found opinions of different races. Coming from a small town with a school about 50% black, I can't deny that I have biases and stereotypes of other races. My whole life before high school I only interacted with white people and in high school I was faced with a completely different playing field. It is still difficult to completely open myself to people of other races without feeling a sense of not so much guilt, but fear of the opinion that they will have of me because I am white. The discussion group gave me a chance to connect with people of other race but not for nearly long enough. Laurie's book accounts for many different discussions in which many people have biases and opinions that differ greatly from person to person and from race to race. Although I am early in my race relations learning, I have become more open to meeting people of other race and connecting on a more personal level, trying not to bias and stereotype because of skin color, appearance, or attitudes. I also realize that a person of color could very easily share all of the same viewpoints as I do, more so than a person of my race. What I'm taking most from all of this is that I want to get to a level where first impressions, physical appearance, and most of all race don't effect my opinions of others. If I could reach this stage, and rid myself of all biases and stereotypes which don't apply in all situations, then I could reach that humanitarian stage in race relations and be able to interact, freely, as myself in all situations.
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I think this post was great and I was really happy to hear it! I find myself thinking differently in situations all throughout the day, wondering what this person i'm walking by is thinking about me, if they are judging my hair, outfit, smile etc. if they are taking my actions differently than I intended them to be portrayed. I just think that it is nice to know that someone else is doing the same thing that I am. Also if everyone does this maybe we won't have to be so self-conscious about our actions and can just live together without the undertone of our differences.
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After reading “Making Peace Between Our Colors” by Laurie Mulvey, I did get a different perspective about Caucasian people. I did not realize that what Caucasians actually were feeling deep down inside. At first I kind of found it hard to believe that they actually cared because they usually put up this shell that blocks their feelings away. Especially when I attended the Race Relations Project, many of the Caucasians did not have any actual experiences related to race issues. I observed how the Caucasians kind of brushed the situation off and did not really share any stories. There was one girl that I remembered, and she just did not contribute in the discussion. The conductors of the discussion group kept trying to get her to contribute, and when she finally spoke up, she told us how terrified she is of Africans-Americans. She is fearful because she does not feel as though she fits in with African-Americans and that they are not accepting to people of her race. It kind of made me mad how she could say that we are not accepting of her race when the real issue is that Caucasians are not fully accepting to the African-American community. But overall, the Race Relations Project turned out to be a really good experience, so I decided to take Sociology 119 that the conductors of the discussion group suggested to take in order to learn more about racial issues. I took that course hoping to learn more about race in depth. I always wondered how Caucasians actually felt deep down inside especially when being called a “racist”. Laurie’s book allowed me to see the thoughts running through their heads. I also feel bad that they have to feel so fearful to speak up because they are afraid to offend any Black or Brown people. I think that is why we, citizens, still face so many issues between Caucasians versus Black and Brown people. The reason we still face racial issues is because Black and Brown people feel as though Caucasians just do not care about the issues amongst them and they are just too good to care. If Caucasians actually showed their feelings towards Black and Brown people, there would be so much less tensions throughout this whole world. But I am sure that there are some select few Caucasians out there that actually does not care, and because of this, they display their ignorance towards Black and Brown people and that is what makes them feel anger towards Caucasians. So, Laurie definitely did a very good job with getting her point across and allowing people of all race to have a different view rather than of their own.
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I agree with this post. I feel after reading the first eight chapters by Lauren Mulvey's book, 'Making Peace Between Our Colors', I have a little bit of a better understanding about the colors and what is going on between us. I'm anxious to finish the rest of the book to see what else Laurie has to say. I think Laurie is brave for presenting all her different experiences with race and writing them down to form a book. She definitely gets her point across and makes us all feel that we could overcome this issue. I would think that after we all read these books, listened to Sam's lectures and watched the videos Sam presents in class, we would all have a different view on race than we did when we first walked into Soc 119. But I feel that even though we are presented with such good material to justify that race is just a color, we are not moving past it.
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I think Laurie’s book really gave me a new perspective. I really enjoyed her brother’s comments about how open he is about race. I completely agree with him about his jokes at work and his issues with workers and his harshness on them. I also agree that if you are going to say that people need to be politically correct it needs to be in every aspect. I’m sure his boss did not think of mentioning every issue with any minority but it does need to be clarified that any type of discrimination is wrong. I also agree with her about how it is hard for people to know exactly what to say. Everyone is their own person and how they want to be classified as far as race is completely up to them. So it is hard to address the issues without specifically asking. All in all I think Laurie’s book really made me think and I enjoyed reading it a lot.
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I definitely agree with this post and think that Laurie's book, "Making Peace Between Our Colors" presented an insightful and important viewpoint. Before reading the book, many of my friends warned me that it would be boring and a waste of time. After reading the book, I was thankful for some of the important lessons Laurie shared in the book. I think the people who enjoy the book, are more likely to be the people who are understanding it more. The people who like it understand how important race relations are. We can look at these stories, relate them to our lives, and try to do the "right" thing if that situation presents itself again. Just like many other people, I have always had different beliefs and perspective about the world. I think about life, interactions, the way things are, and the way things could be a lot. For me, this class has been great because it has been able to reaffirm beliefs I already have. On top of that, it has given further explanation to and evidence for ideas that previously did not make complete sense. For example, before the class I sensed that my learning about the different stages has helped me to see why I have act, do act, and will act a certain way as I continue to learn more about race. It also makes me feel a lot less alone to hear that other people are going through the same exact thing. Like I said, some of the stuff I have been thinking about for a while and hearing other people going through the same thing helps it to make a little more sense. It kind of puts the pieces together. Every week my friends sit in class, texting and struggling to stay awake. Meanwhile, I am hanging on Sam's every last word. As much as I feel like a loser, I am left wondering if I am the only one eating this stuff up. It's nice to read these other comments and see that other people are catching on too. It was even more encouraging reading through many of these posts and seeing that people of ALL races are catching on to this stuff. In the end, the point of this class is to make us think and discuss race. As excited as I am about learning, I'm excited that other people want to learn and are getting it to. I have been begging my friends to come to class sometime. I think that if more people understood the ideas and perspectives Sam is offering in class, that can only be beneficial to society. Sam wants to provoke discussion, through the discussion group and blog, and make us think. Because thinking about and talking about it freely are the only ways we're even going to truly enhance race relations.
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